Double Manifest Destiny w/Cheese. America Dominates Competitive Eating.

Today at Nathan's Coney Island, American Joey Chesnut will attempt to become the first person on Earth to eat over 70 hot dogs in less than ten minutes. On this same day  over two centuries ago, the founding fathers assembled in Philadelphia with no air-conditioning, prepared to sign a document that would change the world. Collectively they felt a strange sensation deep in the pit of their stomachs. It wasn't anxiety or fear, it was hunger. A hunger for independence. Once achieved, It turned out that independence was merely a snack that wouldn't satisfy for long. Like a basket of deep fried pickles before two dozen buffalo wings, our country's appetite became even more ravenous after achieving independence. From the mountains to the praries we consumed everything in our path, ultimately fulfilling our Manifest Destiny. The United States of America stretched from sea to shining sea. There was nowhere else to go. So we turned inward and began expanding our waistlines instead of our borders.* Where there was once "Manifest Destiny" there was now, "Double Manifest Destiny w/Cheese".

We once aimed to be a shining city on the hill, with a thousand points of light yet somehow  got a shining Sam's Club on the corner selling a thousand packets of mayonnaise. Sure America may have lost a step on the world when it comes to health care and education, but when it comes to eating, our dominance is growing larger and larger. I don't believe I am being nationalistic to state that no country can jam their gob holes full of Hot Dogs, Apple Pie and tiny American flags like the good old U,S, and Mother F-n A.

This will be lived out in real time as Joey Chesnut makes his record breaking attempt on Democracy's holiest day. Similar to when pilot Chuck Yeagar became the first person to fly faster than the speed of sound, nobody is sure what kind of eruption exceeding the 70 hot dog mark will bring. A sonic boom? or worse...Where does that old demon live? 

Nobody knows what damage could be wrought, but that isn't Joey Chesnutt's problem. He's got a hundred problems and the hot dogs are only 70. Considering he is ranked #1 in eating, I'll assume the bitch ain't one either. That leaves 29 unaccounted problems, though reasonable minds could speculate on a few problems after ingesting so much pig, but I digress..   

Why isn't competitive eating more popular than the NHL or the Bachlorette? If you really think about it, there are entire networks with less compelling programing than a competitive eating channel would run. "Monday Night Weapons of Mass Digestion" would even give the NFL a run for its money.  Oh, don't bullshit me, you know you would flip over to check it out. Who wouldn't? We all eat. And just think how many possible champions are out there that never even considered the sport? Youth leagues would flourish! How do you know you can't eat the most glazed donuts in eight minutes? You have never tried. (49 glazed by Eric Booker, 2002)

It's amazing how many different categories/divisions there are in the MLE (Major League Eating). Some look fun: like eating 49 crab cakes, some look like torture: eating 7 sticks of butter and some look crazy. 17.7 pounds of Cow Brains by the legendary Kobayashi.

to see the complete list of reigning MLE event leaders click here. Oh, you have to see this. 

Power Eating as an Olympic Sport? At first blush this seems entirely plausible. It's something the whole world has in common and if wrestling can be eliminated, I'll just assume anything goes when it comes to event scheduling. However, upon further reflection it might be harder to implement than I first thought.

I would imagine in some countries, posting "tryouts for the eating team today", could spark riots eventually destabilizing whole sections of the sub Saharan region. This obviously, would make it hard to find coaches. And sponsors would be hesitant to invest the money necessary to build a successful Olympic eating program knowing they were just one military coup away from having to rebuild from the ground up. 

I'd love to keep writing about all this stuff, but it's the 4th of July and my grill is blazing. I've found that a bar- b -qued American Flag is the tastiest way to honor America. Just make sure it doesn't catch on fire or hit the ground before you serve it. I prefer sauce from Montgomery Inn. Mmmmmmmmnnnnn good.

Colin Gawel plays in Watershed and writes for Pencilstorm. For years he has been threatening to write about competitive eating. This is his half-ass attempt jammed in between parenting, running a coffee shop and not letting his wife know he is spending his time dicking around with stupid stories like this.   

 *and don't even get me started on the toothless immigration bill winding its way through congress. Unless we get tougher border control, all those delicious burritos and chimichangas will keep flooding illegally into our country making it virtually impossible for law abiding American citizens to resist and... taking mouths away from homegrown USA dishes like hamburgers and hot dogs. Those burritos aren't even paying taxes yet they still get eaten. I'm so hungry.

Birthday Blog 2013 - Ricki C.

It's my birthday today. I'm 61 years old. I worked a rock & roll show today, playing roadie for Colin Gawel & The Lonely Bones, my good friend Colin's side-project band when Watershed is not taking the stage. The appearance was at Comfest, a local Columbus hippie fete, that I have been attending since its inception in 1972. In some capacity - roadie, performer, stage manager, etc. - I have participated in Comfest since 1978 when I first helped Romantic Noise bassist Greg Glasgow onto the stage after a forklift driver ran over his foot at his warehouse temp job the day before the gig. (Ah, the glamorous rock & roll lifestyle.)

But that's not what this blog entry is about.

This blog entry is about my dad, traveling, hotels and growing old with rock & roll.

My dad was the greatest person I have ever known. He died of a heart attack at the age of 56 when I was 17 years old, April of my senior year of high school. I myself am on my second cardiac pacemaker and have so far outlived him by five years, but only with the bonus benefits of technology.

My father gave me my whole world. When I was 13 years old in 1965, dad started to get me into the rock & roll shows he worked as a ticket agent for Central Ticket Office, an early forerunner of what Ticket Master would become. It was my father's nighttime job after his main occupation at Columbia Gas of Ohio. My mom and dad both worked two jobs. They were children of The Great Depression and carried to their graves a legacy and a fear of not knowing where their next dollar was coming from.

Dad saw how interested I was in rock & roll and started bringing me along with him to shows at Veteran's Memorial or the Lausche Building on the Ohio State Fairgrounds. I was an incredibly shy, introverted child and I think the fact that I was willing to leave the shelter/womb of our house on the West Side to see a rock & roll show heartened my dad so much he'd have brought/driven/conveyed me anywhere, let alone the three or four miles it was from home to Vet's Memorial.

At first it was package shows like The Turtles with Neil Diamond and Every Mother's Son ("Come On Down To My Boat") opening; or Paul Revere & The Raiders with The Standells and Sam the Sham & The Pharoahs. But then, as The Sixties got into full swing I saw Bob Dylan's first electric tour with The Band (when they were still called The Crackers), The Doors, The Jimi Hendrix Experience, Janis Joplin & the Full-Tilt Boogie Band, Cream and, most crucially, The Who on November 1st, 1969. (sidenote: Not one of those shows sold out the 3000-seat Veteran's Memorial. Dad would bring me to the show, wait for the opening acts to start, then pull me a single unsold seat somewhere. Advance sales to The Who show in 1969 were so slow that dad pulled me FOUR SEATS; one each for my best friend and our dates, a date I would almost certainly never have had but for the grace of my dad and of the rock & roll.) (Tickets for that Who show, by the way, were $3.50.) 

Those shows, and rock & roll in general, quite literally gave me a reason for living. (see blog entry The Bathtub, January 13th, 2012.)

Dad gave me other stuff: he instilled in me a love of traveling. In 1962, when I was 10, a coupla years before The Beatles first appeared on the Ed Sullivan Show and Changed Everything, dad had started to take my older brother and I to Cleveland Browns football games. This was in the Browns' heyday, when fullback Jim Brown was a true star of the National Football League and the Super Bowl hadn't even been invented yet. We would stay at the Sheraton Gibson Hotel right off Fountain Square. The Sheraton Gibson, and hotels in general, became MAGICAL to me. You could LIE IN BED and watch television. You could TAKE SHOWERS. (Our bathroom at home sported a claw-foot bathtub only.) You could look out the 20th floor window and see all the lights of the city spread out under you. I felt like a king.  (sidenote: When Pete Townhend's first solo album, Who Came First, was released in 1972 with a track called "Sheraton Gibson" I was BEYOND THRILLED that I had once occupied the same building, the same square footage, as my Number One Rock Hero of that time.) 

I remember very clearly one night in 1965 on the way home from Vet's, when dad was explaining the concept of touring to me, that musicians had to be on the road all the time. I just looked at him wide-eyed and said, "You mean all these guys do is play guitars & drums in a different city every night and stay in hotels in between?" I was incredulous. I was dumbstruck. Dad couldn't have possibly realized what he had just done. He might just as well have stamped Unfit For A Normal Job Of Any Kind across my 13 year old forehead right at that very moment.

My dad never got to travel much; those trips to Cleveland, our family summer vacations to the likes of Cedar Point Amusement Park in Upper Sandusky, an annual autumn trip to South Bend, Indiana, to see a Notre Dame football game with his Columbia Gas buddies. One time when I was 12 he took my sister and I to Florida. It was my first time flying and I was so nervous I threw up on the plane. I was such a miserable little kid. Dad, I wish I could have been better for you.

When my father died I think I had a little nervous breakdown. I can't really remember much of anything from April or May of that year, but by June 1970 when I graduated from Bishop Ready High School I had decided two things: 1) I was never ever going to have a job where I had to wear a suit & tie to work; and 2) I was going to travel and describe to dad all the things I saw.

It's my birthday today. I'm 61 years old. I accomplished the first goal goal by working in warehouses most of my adult life and discovering that bluejeans and a black t-shirt will get you through most days quite nicely. On most of my vacations from work I traveled to see rock & roll bands; to Massachusetts, to Texas, to California, to a lotta points in between. 

I accomplished the second goal by becoming a rock & roll roadie in my 40's and crisscrossing the length & breadth of these United States (multiple times) with Watershed and Hamell On Trial.

Dad, you were with me every step of the way: every new sight out of every car, truck, bus, van & airplane window; every street of every city & town; every mile of every tour. This blog is for you. It's a happy birthday.  - Ricki C. / June 30th, 2013

This entry originally appeared on Ricki's own blogsite - Growing Old With Rock & Roll, www.rickic614.blogspot.com - if you'd like to read more.

Your Life Is Closer To Over: The Occasional Week In Review

I pop in here on occasion and weigh in on a variety of topics weighty, fluffy, and weird. And boy howdy (seriously old reference) do we have a lot of weighty shit going down. 

News

The U.S. Supreme Court ruled last week that the Defense Of Marriage Act was unconstitutional. As I understand it the ruling means that any parties in state recognized same sex marriages would finally enjoy the federal benefits and tax advantages of any other married couple. Chortle to yourself thinking of all the religious conservatives howling over someone paying less in taxes. Anyway Andrew WK put it far better than I:

If you don't believe in gay marriage, then don't marry a gay person. Otherwise, just keep partying and let everyone else keep partying too.

Andrew WK is an underrated voice of wisdom. 

Also the SCOTUS punted California's Prop 8 back to Sacramento killing it would seem that state's ban on same sex marriage. The San Jose Mercury News can explain. My takeaway is that the waters may still be a bit muddied. Wednesday certainly held two wins for equal rights, but it's a long road ahead. 

I found myself wishing the Supreme Court was in a better mood Wednesday and they would revisit the fire hose of legal excrement emanating from their robes Tuesday. I won't lie, I was hardly surprised at the 5-4 vote gutting a key provision of the historic Voting Rights Act of 1965. Nine states covered by section 4 of the VRA would no longer have to "pre clear" changes pertaining to voting with the Feds. Texas Republicans waited just long enough to spray Shout on their bar b que sauce stains before getting out the map and beginning anew the redrawing of congressional districts they were stopped from redrawing by.... wait for it.... The Voting Rights Act Of 1965. Ironically this legislation was originally signed in 1965 by a Texas Good 'Ol Boy named Lyndon Baines Johnson. Guess they showed that S.O.B. right! The SCOTUS ruled with a firm scold from Chief Justice Roberts that Congress really ought to take the hint and pass a new law that would.... oh hell I don't know. For what this is all really about I direct you to Greg Palast. He's fidora sporting, wine swilling muckraker who bothers to delve into such things. What he's unearthed the past decade and a half will make you sick. Do it anyway. Democracy is counting on you. 

I'm not going to comment much on the NSA case. (Hey NSA how's it going. I hope you enjoy reading this as I type it.) I said most of what I wanted to the last time around. I will add that this whole debate has taken a predictable turn. Edward Snowden is now the story and not the fact that your U.S. government, every second of every day, is violating the U.S. Constitution. But hey the fact that I haven't been blown up by a terrorists proves it's all for a good cause right? Anyway the media for the most part is doing an abysmal job covering the story. 

I'll also add this whistle blowing that passed mostly without comment. Is this guy nuts? Is he full of shit? How the hell would I know. I will add that J. Edgar Hoover kept his job for decades by carefully collecting dirt on those who would do him harm. It ain't as far off the reservation as you think. 

Closer to home Ohio Republicans buried a bunch of anti choice stink bombs into the Ohio budget this week. In Ohio we have the line item veto which means Governor Kasich can take a sharpie and remove this crap should he choose. His is a punishing choice however. Sign off and give Democrats a gift wrapped hot button issue or use the line item and be hung drawn and quartered by the loony right. Good luck with that. 

Update. Kasich signed the budget with the anti choice provisions preserved. He left the signing ceremony without taking any questions. Sooner or later he's going to have to answer. Perhaps it'll be in November of 2014. 

Meanwhile Dayton State Senator Nina Turner fired the first troll with SB 307 which would require men to go through all manner of humiliation for access to Viagra. You asked for it boys here it is.  

Sports

It didn't look good, but Sunday night the Blue Jackets and Sergei Bobrovsky agreed on a two year deal to keep the Vezina Trophy winner in Columbus and out of the Russian KHL. 

Meanwhile the Jackets drafted some guys. The brain trust seems to know what they're doing, and I am hardly an expert. I'm sure they're fine players. Can't wait for the new season! 

In Rio Brazil beat Spain 3-0 in the Confederations Cup Final Sunday. Two thoughts. 1. Spain looked sluggish, not only against Brazil, but also in the semi versus Italy.  2. Brazil's Neymar will be the talked about player next summer in the 2014 Cup. This kid is something else:

The finish is amazing, but the devil here is in the details. He made a smart cut back pass, made his run, realized he was offside, quickly corrected, and then blasted the ball into the back of the net near post. World class!

So Aaron Hernandez is fucked right. You already know all about it if you're interested. He's been charged with murder. He may be tied to two other killings a year ago. ESPN actually spent time this week pondering the Patriots' cap hit. That said if you have him in your keeper league you should probably cut him... Unless your fantasy players come from this league:

As a Buckeye fan you can't be shocked that the NCAA gave Oregon the  wink wink nudge nudge last week. It is true that if Chip Kelly ever wants to not make millions coaching in the NFL he'll have to beg for the right to do so. No one is saying this, but I'll say it. To understand Oregon's light treatment you need only look at their corporate benefactor. A recent Sports Illustrated piece on the botched Miami investigation will shed for you light on the impotence and absurdity of the NCAA. They must be destroyed and the sooner the better. Pay the players and pay them now. You are a business start acting like it.

And Finally Tonight

Rather than my usual weird story I direct you instead to remember 19 elite Arizona firefighters who lost their lives this weekend. We don't know yet exactly what happened, but suffice to say even in the best of conditions their jobs are extraordinary difficult. My thoughts and prayers to the families. 

With Podcasts I Ride

I work for a courier service.  I drive almost 300 miles every workday.  I listen to music.  I listen to news radio during rush hour for the traffic reports.  I listen to nothing but the whistling wind.  I listen to podcasts.  These are the podcasts of my driving week.  Maybe you’d like to listen to them, too.

I listen to all of these via iTunes, but they are also streamed from their respective sites, which are linked within the images below. 

WTF with Marc Maron
Post Day: Monday and Thursday

Marc Maron is a comedian.  He is also an excellent conversationalist. After nearly 400 episodes, he has talked to most comics you can think of.  Old, new, some he has history with, some he’s only recently met.  Over the years, he has collected an oral history of what it’s like to be a working comedian. Whether you’ve heard of the person Marc is talking with or not, it will be worth your time.

As the podcast has grown in popularity (and possible exhaustion of the list of comics willing to talk), he has been speaking with more musicians, actors and directors.  All just as engaging as the conversations with his fellow comedians.  Marc has a natural fascination of how people get through life.

Every episode starts with an open monologue.  He uses this time to set some background to the particular interview and whatever else is on his mind.  He has an anxious and aggressive personality.  I've heard it’s not for everyone.  There is a fast forward button.  The talks are great.

Where to Start
Episode #398 - Danny Lobell.  Not only a great conversation with someone who had a comedians podcast before he did, but Marc greets new listeners in the opening and explains how to get the older episodes.  iTunes only has the last 50 episodes.  Here is a list of past guests. 

The Sign-Off
 “Boomer Lives!” One of Marc’s cats left and never came back.

The Firewall and Iceberg Podcast
Post Day: Monday or Tuesday. 

Dan Fienberg and Alan Sepinwall are the Siskel and Ebert of TV criticism. Every week they give you the straight poop on what's airing. They preview coming debuts and review finales.  Do you like Breaking Bad or Mad Men? You're in luck, because they talk about every episode as they air.  And, when the opportunity arises, they will analyze the business of television and the thinking behind programming.  

New content dries up during the summer, so they give themselves a summer project.  In the past, they have re-watched the entire series of Undeclared (episodes #19-26) and the first seasons of Twin Peaks (#77-79, #81-83, #85, #87) and Buffy: The Vampire Slayer (#131, #132-#137, #139-#142). 

This year, however, they are doing something different (and if you ask me, a lot of fun). They will be revisiting TV pilots. They will pick shows that can be found streaming online (Netflix, Hulu, TV.com, HBOGO, etc.) to make watching them a little easier.  The Sopranos kicked things off a few weeks ago (#185).  Taxi, Cheers (both #186) and Veronica Mars followed (#187).  Watch the pilots for The Dick Van Dyke Show and The Mary Tyler Moore Show for next week's conversation.

Where to Start
It's a current events show, so the most recent. Or #185, if you want to get in on the pilot fun.

For in-depth discussions of Breaking Bad and Mad Men episodes:
Breaking Bad, season 4: #85-91, #92-94, #96-98
Breaking Bad, season 5, part 1: #139-142, #144-147
Mad Men, season 4: #27-31, #33-35, #37, #39-42
Mad Men, season 5: #121-128, #130-132, #134
Mad Men, season 6: #176-181, #183-present 

And, if for some reason, you still need more discussion of the final season of Lost, Dan and Alan can get you through that, too (#2a-13, #15-18)

The Sign-Off
 “See you in the next life, Jack.” Midnight Run is Alan favorite movie.

Fight for Comics
Post Day: Wednesday

I started reading comics about a year and a half ago.  I looked for podcasts that reviewed the weekly outpouring of product every week and could clue me in on the vast history of the world I was getting to know. There aren’t many weekly comics podcasts, and this is one of the few (that I found) without Comic Book Guy snark. Oh, they can be sarcastic and frustrated about the comics industry at times, but it’s done without the eye-rolling and attitude of someone who read it all and can’t be impressed anymore. They love comics and it shows.

It took a few episodes to “get to know” these four friends, to fall in line with their patterns. But now, I look forward to their blathering. They are funny guys.  The fact that one of them sounds like somebody I know makes it that much more entertaining.

Where to Start
The last two weeks have been particularly good. Episode #195 is a regularly structured show, while this week's show is all Superman, featuring discussions about Superman Unchained (the new comic series), Superman Unbound (the latest animated movie) and Man of Steel (the latest live-action/computer-animated motion picture).

I Seem Fun: The Diary of Jen Kirkman
Post Day: Wednesday

Jen Kirkman is a comedian. Her drunk history made me laugh. Her albums made me laugh.  Now her podcast makes me laugh every week with her daisy chain stream of consciousness and storytelling. 

(If you're one of those folks who like to read words without pictures, her book, I Can Barely Take Care of Myself: Tales from a Happy Life Without Kids, is very good. )

Where to Start
It’s just a few weeks old; start from the beginning.  But, if you want to jump to some great ghost stories and my new favorite expression, dovetail water slide, go straight to episode six.

Broken Projector
Post Day: Friday

This podcast for FilmSchoolRejects.com is hosted by Scott Beggs and Geoff LaTulippe (screenwriter of Going the Distance). They interview filmmakers, largely independent creators and veterans of the industry, and engage in lively debate on movie-related topics, like which sequel is better: Temple of Doom or The Last Crusade (episode #1)? 

Where to Start
 Hitchcock vs Spielberg (posted January 24, 2013)
What the Hell is Happening to VXF? (March 8, 2013)
Kickstarter for Millionaires (March 15, 2013) 
or the most recent one

And if you want more interviews of independent and veteran filmmakers, check out this podcast's predecessor, Reject Radio.

The Sign-Off
 "See you next Friday" is a riff on John Landis's recurring joke, See you next Wednesday. 

The Empire Podcast
Post Day: Friday

It's the movie magazine for your ears! Hosted by members of the Empire magazine staff, this is a weekly podcast full of answers to listener's questions, movie news, interviews and reviews of the latest releases. Once in a while there will be bonus episodes, which are either extended interviews or spoiler specials. They speak with British and Irish accents, making you a classier person for listening to them.

Where to Start 
The most recent regular podcast. As for the specials: 
The British Board of Film Classification Ratings Special (posted June 6, 2013) is a great look into the how films are rated in the UK with an interview of the BBFC’s executive director. 
The extended interview of Danny Boyle (March 27, 2013)
The extended interview of William Friedkin (June 29, 2012)

Doug Loves Movies
Post Day: Thursday or Friday (the regular show)

Doug Benson is a comedian. And he loves movies. Every week, he guides a group of guests (comedians, actors, directors) though a conversation that usually sticks to cinematic topics and a game or two. It's light-hearted and fun. If you take it too seriously, you are a shithead.

The Leonard Maltin Game is the star of the show for me.  It’s like Name That Tune but with actor’s names and movie titles instead of musical notes and song titles. Since it isn't always explained, here's how it's played:

Once a category is picked, Doug gives the panelists a few clues from Leonard’s review and the number of names listed in the cast. The panelists say how many names they need to guess the movie title. The number is whittled down until someone says “name that movie!” Then, the names are read from the bottom of the cast listing, up, so that the smallest roles are read first.

Panelists can also bid zero names or negative names. With zero names, only the movie title needs to be named.  With negative names,  the panelist must name the movie and the cast listing from the top, down, as Leonard has them listed.

If the panelist gets it right, he or she gets a point. If the panelist gets it wrong, the challenger gets the point. The first person to two points wins.

Where to Start
Scroll through past episode and find guests you've heard of then go from there. There are different lengths of episodes. Start with the ones in the 45-60 minute range.  Those are the regular, weekly shows. Last week's episode with Rory Scovel, Sarah Silverman and Zach Galifianakis is very good.  iTunes doesn’t have much before this year.  The rest can be purchased here. 

The Sign Off
The panelists play for members of the audience. The losing audience members get to have Doug call someone a shithead.

So concludes my podcast week.  

Kindergarden Karma

Wednesday’s may be “hump day” for Joe Lunchbox, porn stars and drive time radio DJs, but around our house it is known as “Daddy Owen Day”. The tradition started six weeks after the birth of our son, Owen when my wife went back to work. The combination of a desire to embrace a ‘hands on’ parenting experience along with a lack of sufficient funds to pay for daycare thrust me onto the frontlines of the battle to shape the youth of tomorrow. We would juggle the little man around our work schedules the other days of the week, but Wednesday was always my day to go solo. Open to close as it were.

Anyway, last Wednesday we were hanging out at the Columbus Zoo on a picture perfect fall afternoon when an interesting subject arose. Snacking on PB & Js, just a smell’s distance from the penguins, a ladybug landed on Owen’s shirt.

 He said, “Dad! A ladybug! This is good luck!”  I replied, “yup, it sure is” 

“What if I put it in a spider web for a spider to eat? Would that be bad luck?”

“Yeah, that would probably be bad karma” 

“What’s bad karma?”

“Well, if you do something bad, bad things will happen to you, if you do good things, one day something good will happen to you.”

Owen clarified: “So if I hit you in the arm, something bad will happen to me?”

“That’s the idea.”

Owen then reared back punched me in the arm. And said, “Let’s go smell the Komodo dragon’s breathe.”

The very next day we are driving somewhere listening to Judas Priest on Boneyard when he says from the back seat, “Dad, I hit you in the arm yesterday and nothing bad happened. Maybe Karma doesn’t exist”

Thinking on my feet, or seat in this case (snicker, snicker) I cleverly respond, “Sometimes you do a bunch of little bad things and eventually they add up and some big bad thing happens to you”

“Oh……” he ponders for a moment “so, I could punch you in the arm 10 days in a row, but, then one day,… someone will come up to me on the playground and punch me in the nuts”

Having never heard my six year old son use that particular expression, I blinked for a long second and said, “Excuse me?”   

He said, “Come on dad, you know what I mean” 

He had me there. I did know. 

 “Two things Owen. First, yes, that pretty much explains karma and second, please don’t use that expression around teachers, or grown-ups that don’t come over to our house to watch football with me"

“OK Dad. Can we stop for a milkshake at Old McDonald's?”

Colin Gawel is a Dad who plays music, sells coffee and writes at Pencilstorm. He will be spending Father's Day watching Owen play little league baseball trying not to have a nervous breakdown because it's just little league baseball after all. You can learn more about him and other Pencilstorm contributors here.