SummerSlam Recap by - Big Vin Vader

SummerSlam Recap

Follow @bigvinvader

 

I went into SummerSlam expecting very little from the show.  After New Japan’s amazing G1 Climax tournament, as well as the catastrophe that was Battleground, I really only saw promise in the Fatal Four-Way main event.  On top of that, last year’s SummerSlam was an abysmal show saved only by John Cena and AJ Styles’ fantastic encounter.  Not to mention that this year’s WrestleMania was a major let-down, so there seemed no reason to expect Vince to pick up the ball after that kind of mess.

Sure, Kevin Owens vs. AJ Styles promised to be good, albeit underwhelming given the addition of Shane McMahon as ref.  And both RAW and SmackDown’s Women’s Title matches were sure to be winners given the talent of the wrestlers involved, but WWE has been giving the division sub-ten minute slots lately.  Only the main event looked to be a surefire thing, and it felt like there could be a legitimate changing of the guard with rumors of Brock Lesnar’s imminent return to UFC.  Those particular matches actually exceeded my expectations, and several of the other undercard bouts proved to be more than worthwhile outings.

The show kicked off with Baron Corbin vs. John Cena, ending their recent feud.  Cena cost Corbin his Money in the Bank cash-in on SmackDown, signaling the company’s total loss in faith in Corbin.  It wasn’t anything special as a match, although Baron did lay a pretty convincing beating into Cena.  Of course, none of that mattered as Cena scored a clean win, pushing Corbin one step closer to full-on burial.  While I’m not a huge fan of his, you almost have to feel bad for Baron at this point, having so many huge opportunities, deserved or not, taken away from him.  He really could have used the win here.

Up next was Natalya vs. Naomi for the latter’s SmackDown Women’s championship, and they more than delivered on the initial promise of their match.  As always, Naomi impressed with her innovative offense, and Natalya continues to be an underrated worker.  They went a good eleven minutes, much better than the usual six-minute window Women’s title matches have been given on most shows.  It was legitimately surprising to see Naomi submit to the Sharpshooter, crowning Natalya the new SmackDown Women’s champion.  Even if her reign is brief, it’s well deserved and it will be interesting to see where she takes the division.

I legitimately did not care about Big Cass vs. The Big Show, and didn’t pay much attention.  All I have to say is that it’s a bad sign when Enzo Amore’s real-life heat is more interesting than the build to a match.  Cass won, by the way

Rusev vs. Randy Orton followed, and it was the definition of a nowhere match for a nowhere feud.  Rusev jumped Orton before the bell, then got pinned after an RKO in five seconds.  That was it.  So two talented young stars were mercilessly buried by the old guard.  Not a great sign so far.

Sasha Banks vs. Alexa Bliss was next, and at this point it seemed a lock for the women’s divisions of each brand to steal the show.  This was a good, brutal, fast-paced match that benefitted from the rumors of real-life heat between the two, as well as its being given nearly fifteen minutes.  Both wrestlers’ strengths were on full display, even with little reaction from the crowd, and they delivered a solid brawl with some serious wrestling mixed in.  Sasha picked up a surprise win, and was given another long-overdue title run.  That didn’t last however, as Alexa regained the belt on the August 28th RAW, which is fine by me as she has continually impressed over the last year.

Finn Balor vs. Bray Wyatt was kind of an oddity on the card, the definition of a midcard, B-level PPV match featuring two stars who deserve better.  It’s sad to think that Finn was in the first-ever Universal Title match with Seth Rollins at this same show last year.  Even sadder that he won, was stripped due to injury, and has yet to recover on RAW.  Bray spent the early months of this year as WWE champion and has since gone downhill himself.  Balor’s Demon King character reappeared for the first time since last year’s SummerSlam, and the crowd was going crazy for him.  There was some good monster-versus-monster psychology on display, and the match actually came together much better than I had expected.  Balor picked up a much-needed win, and hopefully he’ll start being taken seriously once again.

The reunion of Shield members Dean Ambrose and Seth Rollins has been a big storyline lately, and it was no surprise just how good they worked together against Sheamus and Cesaro.  This was one of the better Tag Team Title matches I’ve seen in a while, and it was full of exciting spots and excellent chemistry all-around.  In easily the best match thus far, Ambrose and Rollins managed to win the belts from the odd couple.  Everyone looked great, and it was nice to see the former Shield mates get some due recognition after floundering for most of the year.

Kevin Owens vs. AJ Styles should have been the unquestionable match of the night, and even while it was slightly disappointing, it came close.  There’s been a good build to the story, although their previous two matches were somewhat underwhelming.  The problem this time was the announcement of Shane McMahon as guest referee.  There were the expected unnecessary ref bumps in the middle of the match, but Owens and Styles delivered the best of their three matches so far, with parts coming together perfectly.  There’s bound to be a McMahon-Owens feud coming up, especially since Kevin is forbidden from challenging AJ again.

I think every wrestling fan was dreading Shinsuke Nakamura vs. Jinder Mahal for the WWE Championship.  I know I was.  It never should have been booked in the first place, as it’s debatable whether Shinsuke is currently equipped to carry the entire SmackDown brand, and that meant he would have to lose to someone far inferior to him in the ring.  Which is what happened.  Don’t get me wrong, as with all of his recent matches, Jinder was far from terrible, but also just as far from exceptional.  They used the same distraction finish with the Singh Bros.’ interference costing Shinsuke the match.  That was awful.

The Fatal Four-Way between Samoa Joe, Braun Strowman, Roman Reigns and Brock Lesnar for the Universal Championship was the bright light on the card.  Joe and Lesnar have proven to be a good match for one another, Reigns and Strowman have done the same, and a Lesnar-Strowman match-up has been teased for some time as the next big thing.  On top of that, Lesnar’s promise to leave the company should he lose and the real news of his interest in a UFC return made this legitimately unpredictable.  Keeping with the company’s good track record of multi-man matches this year, this one delivered non-stop, chaotic and crowd-pleasing action.  Braun vs. Brock surpassed all expectations, with Strowman dominating Lesnar on the outside, destroying two tables and flipping a third onto the stunned champion.  Braun looked absolutely vicious and credible here, nothing like the green monster heel of this time last year.  He really is ready for bigger things, and demonstrated that in true fashion with this career-best performance.  Nobody looked bad, but Strowman just delivered such a powerhouse showing that it’s hard to focus on much else.  They carried Brock out on a stretcher for the middle portion of the match, which all but ensured his victory, although it made him look vulnerable for the first time in far too long.  It was one of the main roster’s best all-round matches this year, and the space I have here truly can’t do justice to the carnage they captured in its twenty-minutes length.  A great end to a rocky show, albeit one eclipsed in every way by NXT, yet again.

 

This next part is a lot trickier to address, so I’ll just approach the facts of the matter: WWE have come under fire from a number of longtime fans and supporters for failing to comment on the president’s recent comments regarding the violence in Charlottesville.  This isn’t a political column, and my opinions are not going on record at this time, especially since I don’t feel that I’m qualified to discuss such matters.  Despite that, the fact remains that Donald Trump has been involved in the WWE product in varying capacities over the years, and is a member of the Hall of Fame’s beyond-dubious celebrity wing.  In addition to this, the McMahons donated millions of dollars to Trump’s campaign, which all but ensured Linda McMahon’s appointment as Administrator of the Small Business Administration.  Also worth noting is that wrestlers in the company were reportedly forbidden from commenting on the 2016 election on social media.  Regardless of one’s feelings on any of these matters, it’s hard to argue that WWE (or at the least, the McMahons) is tied up into the whole issue through their long association.  That being said, it’s kind of pointless to expect accountability for WWE’s behavior as it pertains to ethical issues, and there are a number of examples in the recent past that exemplify this.

Brock Lesnar is one of the clearest example of the company’s problems with accountability for their and their performers’ actions.  It gets brought up every once in a while, but not often, that in 2004 Brock Lesnar told an ESPN reporter, “I don't like gays. Write that down in your little notebook. I don't like gays.”  So not only is he on record with a homophobic statement (and off the record with even more offensive language), but he went through the motions to specify his meaning, not caring that it was made public.  And he continues to be one of the company’s highest-paid, -drawing, and most protected wrestlers, not to mention the current Universal Champion.  I don’t know of anyone going out of their way to call Brock Lesnar a good person, and that isn’t his intention in the slightest.  He’s made it clear that he shows up, works, gets paid, and goes home.  That’s all they need him to do as long as he draws big, gets a good reaction, and occasionally have decent matches.  All of which he does.

Then again, that interview is over a decade old at this point, and Brock wasn’t even in the company at the time it occurred.  However, after his concussion-inducing beatdown on Randy Orton at last year’s SummerSlam, Brock was approached by an angry, concerned Chris Jericho.  In the skirmish that ensued, Brock is rumored to have called Jericho a number of homophobic and sexist names.  Not only was Lesnar on WWE’s dime at the time, but he was also backstage at one of their events.  And to this day, a full year later, there’s still been no release on the actual content of his comments, but that doesn’t seem to matter to anyone, and the event has basically been forgotten.  All of this has conveniently faded away, especially for a company that openly touts its affiliation with GLAAD (not to even get into the issue of their essentially scripting a legit concussion).

This is all meandering on my part, so it’s important to remember that WWE is openly affiliated with GLAAD (not that they haven’t had several fallings out in the past).  I obviously can’t speak for anyone else, but it makes you wonder how an openly-gay superstar like Darren Young must feel being part of the same company as a person on record as Lesnar is, all the while they tout their progressive affiliations and attitudes.  Seems hypocritical.  And imagine if Young were to try and call WWE to task for supporting Lesnar following his homophobic remarks.  Is there any doubt that Young would essentially be told to take a hike if he doesn’t like it, simply because Lesnar is so much bigger a draw, with greater crossover appeal?  Or what about Pat Patterson, who’s been with the company for decades, openly gay for much of that time, and who was even falsely demonized during the company’s early-90s sex scandals because of his sexual orientation?  You have to wonder what his thoughts are regarding Lesnar’s role in the company, and how he feels about that infamous interview.  The thing is, nobody has asked either of them, as Lesnar’s homophobic remarks are never discussed anymore.  They’re on the public record for everyone to see, and WWE seems fine to let things rest at that because they don’t need another PR nightmare.

An even more recent, infamous, and actively troubling example of the company’s failure to hold itself or its employees accountable for their questionable actions is the entire Mauro Ranall-JBL bullying controversy.  Mauro is easily the best announcer working full-time in professional wrestling today, and his presence on the SmackDown commentary team raised that brand’s play-by-play up from utter nonsense.  He also suffers from bipolar disorder and has been very open about this fact, doing all he can to spread awareness and help others like him.  Fans love Mauro, and his excellence as an announcer is highly-esteemed throughout the industry.  JBL is a terrible person with limited wrestling skills, esteemed highly within WWE simply because he is a company man and has stayed loyal for over two decades, which led to his lengthy world title run on SmackDown over a decade ago.*  He has a long history of harassment, bullying, and out-and-out drunken jackassery.  Because of his tenure, and a seeming closeness with Vince McMahon, all of his actions are excused and swept under the rug.  WWE has an alliance with anti-bullying campaign Be a Star, a fact they shove down every fan’s throat with endless commercial vignettes.  This should not be a bad thing.

Earlier this year, JBL openly mocked Mauro receiving the Wrestling Observer’s Announcer of the Year award on-air, a move that was absolutely endorsed and approved by Vince McMahon himself.  After missing several weeks for various reasons, it came out that Mauro had actually been suffering from severe depression.  The culpability of JBL’s taunts were heightened when former ring announcer Justin Roberts’ autobiography was released shortly after, as that book contained several stories of specific bullying perpetrated by the former champion.  The larger issue is that this is an ongoing thing, as other wrestlers (Edge, to name one), in biographies as well as interviews, have confirmed JBL’s influence backstage, as well as his brash, aggressive nature.

Ultimately, Mauro missed weeks of television and PPVs, before reporting his departure from the company.  In the weeks prior to this announcement, fans and journalists were calling for JBL’s head, and considering his behavior and the risk at which it put Mauro, it makes sense.  But after Ranallo’s departure, the whole thing kind of died down, stopping just before it became a full-blown scandal.  In a statement that reeked of a non-disclosure agreement, Ranallo stated that his leaving had nothing to do with JBL.  If that seems fishy, what then of his hasty return to the company a few months later, now working full-time on NXT, far away from JBL?  I do have to say that it’s fantastic to have him back on a major stage, and NXT is arguably a much better fit for his hyper-energetic commentary style.  But even with his return, there was little discussion of the events that made him leave in the first place, and that seems wrong.

I guess I’m just rambling, but the main point, I think, is that it’s kind of ridiculous to expect WWE to really back what they’re saying and work toward positive, progressive change in light of this kind of history.  And that’s really discouraging, and I know of several folks who have given up on the company entirely in recent months because of such behavior.  It makes it seem that the majority of the company’s charitable gestures and associations are solely for appearances, which makes sense in the most cynical of senses.  To look at it historically, wrestling was never clean, family entertainment until Vince McMahon raided the territories and built up his semi-cartoon empire in the mid 1980s.  At that point, wrestling became sports entertainment and was then answerable to network decency standards.  Remember, the “family-friendly” WWE (then still the WWF) was beset with a host of cocaine and steroid addiction issues.  Down the line the company faced a major steroid trial (although the testing policies resumed their formerly-lax course shortly after until the late 2000s), a sex scandal involving ring boys and enhancement talent accusing high-ranking officials, controversy over the raunchiness of Attitude Era storylines, Owen Hart’s horrific death during a PPV, and most notably the now-decade-old Chris Benoit tragedy.  That’s a lot of dirt to dig up on such a public company, so no wonder they want to keep their image squeaky-clean.  But why has nobody been prying into these more recent issues?

Things change in some respects, and remain entirely the same in most others.  Vince McMahon is still reportedly body-shaming talent (Kevin Owens), putting titles on the most impressively-muscled guys on the roster, and burying popular underdogs (that would be Sami Zayn, as well as Bayley).  As much as we may want the things and people we like and support to endorse the same beliefs as ourselves, it often ends in disappointment.  Even when major issues like these arise, no matter what the fan backlash may be, WWE is an entertainment corporation above all else, and they will only take a stance on what they feel looks the best for them.  To not comment on the violence in Charlottesville or the political situation it is wrapped up in, or even Lesnar’s homophobic attitudes and JBL’s line-crossing, is entirely within their rights.  As disappointing as that is, it’s just where things rest nowadays.

 

*Author’s opinion

Baver's Buckeye Bag / Ohio State vs Indiana - by Brent Baver

Every week of the college football season, Pencilstorm Buckeye guru answers our questions and yours. Follow and shoot him questions @baverbuckeyebag

Colin: Why did we schedule a conference weeknight road opener and what is the upside?

Brent: I think Gene Smith likes to show that OSU is willing to be a “team player”, where it will do some of the things that lesser B1G programs do, like playing a Thursday night game. In that sense, I think it’s pathetic. Ohio State is the elite of the elite, and should never be playing on a Thursday night. But my guess is that Urban was up for this, in that it gives them 2 extra days to prepare for a top-10 Oklahoma team.

Colin: Lots being made about the OSU D-Line playing more aggressive this year. What's the ceiling for this unit compared to past great Buckeye lines? 

Brent: It’s definitely the deepest unit I have seen here in the 40+ years I have been following Ohio State. Opposing coordinators have to be shaking their heads when they see Nick Bosa and Jalyn Holmes come in as “backups”. And it sounds like DT Dre’Mont Jones has made as much progress as any player on the team, other than maybe Damon Arnette. Not sure the 4 starters are as good as the ’02 foursome of Will Smith, Darion Scott, Kenny Peterson and Tim Anderson, but when you take depth into account, I think it will end up being the best D-line OSU has ever had.

Colin: Could Weber see his job threatened but upstart JK Dobbins? Any other youngsters you expect to have an impact right out of the gate?

Brent: A month ago I would have told you no way, but with Weber’s hamstring and Dobbins huge camp, I now think Dobbins will steal a decent amount of Weber’s carries. It also sounds like Dobbins is ahead of the curve in terms of blocking, a skill Urban demands of his backs and receivers. If healthy, I think Weber will likely remain your #1 guy all year, but he had a recent setback with the hammy. As for other youngsters, Kendall Sheffield is going to get a lot of PT as the 3rd CB. True frosh Jeffrey Okudah and Shawn Wade will push the top 3 corners as the season goes on.

Colin: Guest question from Rob Bumgarner: Can Isiah Prince hold up on the O Line?

Brent: I guess I believe the “he’s turned the corner” talk to an extent, but I still have to see it to really believe it. There has never been a question regarding Prince’s talent, which is part of the reason why he kept his job the entire 2016 season despite his poor protection numbers. The Bucks really, really need Prince to step up if they want to challenge for a Nat’l Title.

Colin: How do you see this game going down?

Brent: My how things have changed with the Hoosiers, as they are not far from having top 5 defense in the league, while their offense may struggle. With a suspect O-line and probably the weakest set of backs in the league, Indiana is going to struggle scoring on an OSU defense that is the class of the B1G. If Indiana is going to have success on O, it will be through the air, as they have a solid QB in Lagow, and a nice set of WRs as long as you add Simmie Cobbs to the group. Cobbs may be held out Thursday night based on a July arrest. I think this one stays tight for awhile, with Ohio State’s depth wearing the Hoosiers down and the Buckeyes covering late. I’ll say Ohio State 35-10.

Colin: It seems like all the smart money is on Bama, Bucks, USC and FSU being the final four. Who of that group is most vulnerable and who do see you see as a sleeper nationally?

Brent: I think USC is the most vulnerable with the expectations now so much higher, and I still question whether Todd Helton is the guy for USC. Not sure you can call Washington a sleeper after making the Playoff a year ago, but few are talking about them this year, as it’s all USC this and USC that. I expect Washington to win the Pac 10 again. A deeper sleeper? Hard for me to choose one as all these teams seem to have material weaknesses, but maybe one out of the group of Miami, Texas, or dare I say it….Michigan.

Colin: Some big match-ups for opening weekend. What other games and lines will you be keeping an eye on?

Brent: It wouldn’t shock me to see the Noles upset Bama, although going against Bama in these early games is usually not smart. I do like FSU catching 7 pts in this one, but think Bama gets the W. By the way, Alabama is 0-3 (outright) in their last 3 games when they haven’t had Lane Kiffin as their OC. The Michigan – Florida game should be an old fashion defensive struggle. I tend to think Michigan pulls this one out, but if you can catch more than a FG, like it is now with the Gators a 3 ½ pt dog, I think you take the points. There is really nothing else that jumps out at me from a betting standpoint in Wk 1.


Pencilstorm Staff and Friends Weigh In On Mayweather v McGregor

We are hosting a viewing party for this fight at the Pencilstorm offices (thanks for the FREE cable, Mr. Biggie) and we thought it would be fun to get thoughts of everybody attending before the big "fight."  Below are the responses. - Colin G. 

 

Ben Galli (Pencilstorm NBA Beat Writer) - MMA or UFC was never something I was really into.  I remember starting to see crowds gather for live events at the old BW3's on campus in the early 2000's.  I noticed the increase in acquaintances that were going somewhere to "watch the fight" even though there wasn't any boxing on and more dudes on the street wearing Affliction shirts.  I understood the draw (not to the shirts) but I'd rather just watch Bloodsport again.  However, recently, I have made a point to see any fight Conor McGregor is in.  Maybe it's the braggadocio that he backs up or the underdog's confidence that you can't help but root for, but he's brought me slightly into UFC.  And I will watch this fight and I will root for McGregor (especially due to Mayweather's past behavior) because even though I think Money is one of the best boxers of all time and should easily win the match, you're saying there's a chance! 

 

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Big $ (North Coast Posse / Browns Beat) - I was a casual "boxing guy" until I saw my first Conon McGregor interview. From that time I've been a full-fledged unapologetic "UFC bro" (visor and Ballers on DVR sold separately). I'm head over heels for the sport and thus my perspective is a little MMA biased, but as someone who has watched every Conor fight here is why Mayweather domination is not a foregone conclusion:

- Conor's left is an absolute sledgehammer, he has serious one-punch power for a 155 pounder. In his loss to Diaz, Nate mitigated that power by inside kicks to Conor's front leg. Eventually Conor couldn't push off and Nate got him to the ground. Obviously Floyd won't have that option. It will be interesting to see how aggressive Conor will be when he does not have to defend against or worry about kicks.

- Although the UFC rules aren't in play, Conor will still be able to employ some of his Martial Arts discipline. If Floyd is deeking and dunking in an arm's reach (which Floyd is known to do) or wrapping up the muy Thai, MMA style prepares fighters to strike in tight spaces. Conor is also very adept at shrinking the octagon, if this translates to getting Floyd cornered, I don't know how many combos Floyd will be able to with stand.

- Lastly, Conor's jaw is made of steel. If Floyd goes on the offensive, Conor will be able to withstand every strike and will need only small window to sling a widow-making haymaker.

So that's my take, from a decided green, orange and white tinted-glasses perspective. All I'm saying is don't be so quick to write of the notorious Conor, and enjoy the spectacle.

Brian Phillips (CD1025 Morning Show) - Both of these guys seem like assholes. 

Ryan Haye (Boxing Aficionado/ bass player in Ghost Shirt) - Just as Patrick is a die-hard MMA fan, I feel it's important to note that I have been watching boxing since before I could spell boxing or spell box, for that matter. Having said that, I would love nothing more than to watch the guy who's never fought a single round in a professional boxing match beat the guy who, despite being an asshole of heroic proportions, is considered one of best boxers of all-time.

The reality is that Conor doesn't stand a chance in hell. None. Zilch. Zero. I would be willing to bet that the Irishman doesn't even land a punch, and I will take all bets that the poor Mick doesn't win a round. I could break down the fight by pointing out that nobody has ever really hurt Mayweather, and that includes De La Hoya, Canelo Alvarez, Miguel Cotto, and Manny Pacquiao. For those that don't know, I just named some of the best boxers of all time, and none of these could hurt, let alone find, Mayweather in the ring. But, I won't break down the fight, because it doesn't matter, it's a done deal. Prediction:  Mayweather in...whatever round he decides to end the fight.

Can we talk about GGG vs. Alvarez?

Ricki C. (Medicare patient / NFL fan) - As a child in the late-1950's/early 1960's I would watch the Friday Night Fights on our piece-of-furniture Zenith TV with my sainted Italian father and my big brother.  That's right, boys & girls of the "Pay Per View" 21st Century, back in the Dark Ages boxing was shown on network TV.  (And there only THREE networks and THREE channels back then. The only "pay-per-view" aspect was that your dad might have to buy some Barbasol shaving cream the next day at Big Bear.)  Jeeez, two men beating each other bloody on a Friday night was considered healthy prime-time entertainment.  (Actually, on the West Side - where I grew up - we could just glance out our front window and get that same "entertainment.")  Anyway, in honor of my dad and my brother Al, I'm goin' Mayweather all the way.

James Baumann (Buckeye Hoops Expert and Overall Renaissance Man) - I don't know squat about this fight (or any other one, for that matter) other than it seems like they are both horrible human beings and the best possible outcome would be that they both knock each other into something resembling a coma, but more painful than that.

Colin Gawel (Bowler, Cheap Trick Fan) - For the first time, I'll be rooting for Mayweather. Like Ryan, I'm a fan of the sweet science. To me, UFC fights have all the poetry of watching skate crash compilations on youtube.  AS IN, not much. And I agree that GGG vs Alverez (and even Rungvisia vs Chocolatito) will be much more competitive fights than this one.

However, there is no denying the pure spectacle this match-up  provides. Floyd was shrewd to make his heel turn from "Pretty Boy Floyd" to "Money Mayweather". And the fact that he is truly a dick makes the "Money" character that much more irritating.  (Click here for excellent story about that on 538)  But Conor is not one to be "out-dicked" so when he told Floyd to "dance for me boy," it rubbed me the wrong way. I know Conor was just saying it for shock value and the whole purpose of the publicity tour was to get suckers like me worked up into buying the fight, but I fell for it anyway. There are too many real dudes floating around thinking the same thing for me to take that as just harmless trash talk. I'm pulling for Floyd to get some payback.

And yes, I'm aware that I've basically turned into a grumpy old man who prefers boxing to that new-fangled UFC the kids love and I'm offended by McGregor's trash talk. What a drag it is getting old. Having said that, I like Money to get Conor off my lawn by the 7th round.  

David Martin -  Mayweather's boxing skills are off the charts. I think he will win. I also think it's possible he takes a dive or holds back in order to generate interest in a lucrative rematch.

Patrick Buzzard -  March 31st, 1985.  For me, that was the first time worlds collided.  It was the first Wrestlemania.  The Main Event was Hulk Hogan and Mr. T vs. Rowdy Roddy Piper and Paul Orndorf.  Worlds Collided.  A professional actor wrestled with three of the biggest professional wrestlers of the day at the biggest event conceivable!  What could possibly be next?   After that, as teenagers we would guzzle Jolt Cola and argue if the United States would send Bo Jackson, and ONLY Bo Jackson, to the Olympics??  

It really hasn't really happened since.  Not to that level, at least. It takes more than being outrageous.  It's takes the perfect storm.  It takes the perfect players. Enter Conor McGregor.

An outlandish, boastful carnival barker packaged in a lethal MMA fighter.  Throwing stones at the "establishment" and campaigning for the fight of the century against the old guard, Floyd Mayweather,  the champion of a by-gone era.  It's great entertainment.  It's something that won't happen again at this level.  So enjoy the circus.  I know I will!

I'll be watching live.  My prediction is Mayweather is no fool.  He will not get into a toe-to-toe punch out scenario.  He is smart and knows how to win and is going to jab McGregor to death.  It goes the distance and neither get embarrassed, but the win to Floyd. 

Joe Oestreich (Author, Bass Player, Hurricane Survivor)- I'm not watching, but I have a prediction: The MMA dude beats the boxer in a shocking upset, which means that a rematch is set and they both get the huge payday a second time.

Scott Pleasant (CEO Pleztone Studios, Author, AC/DC Fan ) I'd say Joe's about right with that. What are the rules? If they have to go by straight boxing rules, I say advantage boxer. If the boxing rules are modified to allow some MMA, I say advantage MMA guy. It all sort of reminds me of when Rocky fought Thunder Lips with Mr. T. in the audience. (Watch it here)

Wal Ozello (Author, Singer)  The fact of the matter is I haven’t watched a fight since Tyson v Holyfield.  That’s when boxing was AWESOME.  I mean Tyson is a beast.  If you can’t knock someone out in the first round then what are you doing boxing?  Nobody fights like Tyson.  On Saturday night, I’ll be combing through youtube watching reruns of Tyson fights. Check out when he knocks out Michael Spinks. (Watch all 1:26 minutes here)

 

 

Big $ Talks to Brian Phillips About the Kyrie Trade on CD1025. Listen Here.

The Pencilstorm offices descended in chaos early Tuesday evening as news of the big Cavs / Celtic trade hit the interwebs. The North Coast Posse's Big $ was none too pleased and CD1025 Morning show host Brian Phillips invited him to the studio the following day to vent his frustrations on air. 

Click here to listen to their conversation

The N.F.L. is the Sport for Stupid People: #TBT - by Colin Gawel

Pencilstorm Throw-Back Thursday 08/04/17

Originally published September 2014. It still gets hits. Go figure. Click here for current not-stupid NFL coverage by Brian Phillips.

Before you can say, "What? Me stupid? That's unpossible!" - let me explain. I'm not trying to be an elitist or a contrarian.  I too, like you, care deeply about all sorts of stupid things. In fact, just this past month I'll have you know that I.......

A) Forked over $50 to watch WWE Summerslam and.....

B) Watched every episode of "4th and Loud" - the reality TV show about arena football team the L.A. KISS, starring Gene Simmons and Paul Stanley.

I think reasonable people can agree it doesn't get much dumber than that. 

And before you soccer types get all excited that this is going to be some manifesto on the merits of Premier League Football over American football, that isn't happening either. Despite an exciting World Cup, I much prefer Uncle Sammy's brand of pigskin. In fact, I play in two fantasy football leagues and this Sunday while I am coaching third base for my son's little league team, I will be crying on the inside knowing that I will be missing the Browns opener. (Though it is sure to be another curbstomping compliments of the dreaded Steelers.)

So, though I like the NFL like all normal people, I HATE NFL coverage. God, it never stops. Ugh. BARF. So dumb. So Boring. Every single day of the year ESPN jams the "THE NATIONAL FOOTBALL LEAGUE" down my throat and I am so very tired of it. I know you are too. I can feel my poor brain cells dying of boredom as they absorb questions like who will start at center for Green Bay and will Jacksonville win over or under 3.5 games. The company line is, "The NFL is the nation's most popular sport, so we have to talk about it every 15 minutes, 365 days a year because YOU can't get enough of it." Okay, sure. Still, McDonald's is America's most popular restaurant, but everybody knows it sucks. Just because something is the most popular doesn't mean it is good. Just check out the top song on the charts right now. Whatever it is, I bet dollars to donuts, it blows.  

But why does NFL coverage bother me so much? The odd thing is, though I am much less likely to watch a entire regular season NBA game than  I would an NFL game,  I love reading about the NBA. I like ESPN stories about the NBA, but not the National Football League. Why is this? Some theories......

For one, I hate that every talking head has stopped using the abbreviation NFL and almost always refer to THE NATIONAL FOOTBALL LEAGUE. My theory is that using the longer name fills content over the course of a grinding 24 hour news cycle. By just stretching that out and saying it say, 1,500 times a day, that's almost 45 minutes of airtime each day filled by somebody just saying, "He is going to have to make that throw if he wants to keep his job in the…NATIONAL FOOTBALL LEAGUE."

For two, ESPN treats the entire country like we are all superfans of all thirty two NFL teams. They will do a full twenty minute segment on Maurice Jones Drew joining the Raiders or Ryan Tannahill learning a new playbook. This would be would be fine if I lived in Oakland or Miami. But I don't. Why are they telling me this in such fine detail? Do you know how hard it is to run on a treadmill in February while enduring a 12-minute story on the possible new Carolina Panthers starting wide receivers? Basically, they take waiver wire stories and treat them like the lead segment on 60 Minutes. Who fucking cares? Who are these people that enjoy this? Is there a comment section giving 99% approval I haven't seen?

For three, and this is the big one, I suspect Bill Simmons has done such a good job covering the NBA, it just shines a light on how many dumb jocks cover football. All those jackasses standing around in designer suits on a fake football field flapping their gums for two straight hours and they never have anything interesting to say. How is that possible? Professional football is, by far, the most complex sport on the planet, but nobody seems to able able to write a story about it that is interesting.

Watching Bill Simmons and Jalen Rose do a podcast on the NBA is great fun. Watching the FOX NFL pre-game show is like having your eyes gouged out with stale celery stalks.

So maybe the NFL isn't the sport for stupid people after all. Perhaps it is the sport for stupid journalists and it's just hard to tell the difference.  Either way, thank GOD we can finally start watching THE NATIONAL FOOTBALL LEAGUE and stop talking about it. For a day anyway.

Colin Gawel plays in the band Watershed and started Pencilstorm as a way to kill time at his coffee shop, Colin's Coffee. As he is writing this, he is watching that guy lip syncing that "Happy" song before the NFL opener in Seattle. Some sort of lame kick-off party. How very stupid indeed.  

 

 

 

 

JT Barrett is the Greatest QB in OSU History. Does he Suck? Baver Answers.

Baver covers Buckeye Football for Pencilstorm. Follow @baverbuckeyebag

Colin: You seemed downright giddy about new offensive coordinator Kevin Wilson after the spring game. What are you seeing that has you so excited?

Baver: We saw screen passes that were actually executed the way screens are supposed to be executed, saw a passing game that had all the parts in sync with one another, and actually saw pass catchers running crossing patterns. The coaches pretty much abandoned the crossing patterns late last year, so that was a nice site. Yeah, it was just a spring game, but Kevin Wilson is just what the doctor ordered for this offense. The Buckeye offense struggled mightily against every good defense they faced last year, and after the 31-0 beat down by Clemson, Urban finally got the wake up call and sent two offensive coaches packing. And Kevin Wilson was there for the taking. Now, Wilson is working with 4 and 5-star guys instead of the 3-star guys he had at Indiana. Yeah….I am giddy as can be.

Colin: The million dollar question. JT Barrett will go down statistically as the greatest QB in Ohio State history. By far. Is he any good?

Baver: As of right now, I think he’s far better than most OSU fans think he is. But I get it….even when he had time to throw last year, he often missed WR’s badly. The 2nd qtr play against Michigan when Barrett launched the ball way over a wide-open Curtis Samuel comes to mind. It was a simple throw, and Samuel would have likely taken that one 94 yards to the house…and Barrett air-mailed it. But JT is a gamer. 5 OT drives that he has led as a Buckeye….the results? 5 touchdowns. He’s the guy you want with the ball in his hands when the game is on the line. This year, I still don’t expect him to throw the ball as well as he did in ’14, but I expect him to look a lot better with the tutoring he has gotten and will get from Kevin Wilson and new QB coach Ryan Day. 

Colin: How can we seriously expect a breakout performance from any WR or TE? Who do you expect to break out and what will the numbers look like?

Baver: Maybe it wasn’t too bold of a call, but I had Curtis Samuel as the most likely offensive player to breakout a year ago at this time, followed by Noah Brown. (click here to read that story) They both had breakout seasons last year, to different extents. I don’t see a TE making big noise, but I think the new hybrid, Parris Campbell, is your breakout guy this year. We saw glimpses of what Parris is capable of last year on kick returns, and I think it all comes together for him this year, on returns, rushes and as a pass catcher. Numbers? I don’t think you’ll see 700+/800+ rushing/receiving yards like Samuel did, but I think you could potentially see 400+ and 700+, respectively.

Colin: Is Mike Weber a world class back like top 5 programs come to expect? What recent Ohio State starting RB is he better than?

Baver: Not sure if it’s fair to ask what recent Buckeye RB he is better than, with Weber having only one season in the books so far. I thought he was a solid back last year and felt he should have been used more down the stretch. Urban is singing Weber’s praises this summer, and he was 4th on Ohio State’s 40-yard dash board in June. Weber has also showed up as a 1st rounder in some 2018 NFL mock drafts. World-class? Not sure. Ezekiel level? No. But I think Weber is in for a big year if he stays healthy.

Colin: Can this OL dominate if we have trouble throwing the ball downfield or could we see a repeat of MSU, Michigan and Clemson against a stout D?

Baver: OL is my biggest concern on offense. They probably should have fired a trio of Buckeye offensive coaches, instead of just a pair, as Greg Studrawa ain’t gettin’ it done. And I can’t imagine that OSU couldn’t find an elite O-line coach that would be worlds better than Stud. Obviously Isaiah Prince has to make huge strides after Pro Football Focus graded him out as the worst pass-blocking O-lineman in the FBS last season, allowing 45 QB pressures. I think you’ll see better results as a whole in ’17 with Kevin Wilson being more involved with the Slobs, but I am still taking a wait and see approach.