Weep For My Family. It's The NFC Championship Game

(Editor's note: Brian Phillips grew up in the Olympic Peninsula town of Port Angeles, Washington. He's followed the Seattle Seahawks since their 1976 inception. He attended the Hawks first win ever, a last second 17-16  pre-season thriller over the San Diego Chargers. His childhood heroes were Jim Zorn and Steve Largent. His first  paid radio job involved plugging in local commercials  during Seahawks broadcasts at KQQQ in Pullman, Washington. Living in Ohio has not dulled his Hawk passion. Don't ask him about the 12th Man, or Beast Mode, or 'You Mad Bro' or any of that shit unless you like getting spittle on your face. )

As my Seahawks have continued on their inexorable march to this evening's NFC Championship Game friends have been checking in to see where I'm watching. I've had no answer. Home seems the safest option. My wife and daughters have grown to accept my frothing. I'm sure it's not easy. Whenever I see this commercial I'm filled with fear that I am this guy:

Some fans will do whatever it takes to help their team win. After all, it's only weird if it doesn't work.


The Bier Stube across from the campus Gateway is owned by a Seahawk fan for crying out loud. I could go there, but he's trying to run a business. I don't want to scare away the regulars. 

My buddy Nick is always understanding, but he's a Patriots' fan. What if the Pats lose? He'll be in no mood for my nonsense. I watched this game with him in 2012. I thought he was going to brain me with his shoe.

Seahawks winning touchdown including an unhappy Pats fan. With just over a minute left in the 4 quarter Russ Wilson connected with Sydney Rice which ended up being the winning TD with a final score of Seahawks 24 - Patriots 23


The issue of course is that when it comes to the Seahawks I am reduced to some sort of feral or childlike state. This play from last week's Saints game had me baying at the moon:

Huge hit on Percy Harvin in the Playoffs against New Orleans


It's best that I separate myself from the herd and watch alone save for any member of my family crazed enough to join me. We know 49ers/Seahawks will be one for the ages. I should probably wear a helmet myself. 

My picks:

Seahawks 20 49ers 17

The other game:

(This one is actually a lot harder to pick. The weather won't be a factor... 61 and sun in Denver today if you can believe that. The conditions should be sufficient for Manning to do what he does)

Broncos 38 Pats 34

Ray Davies is the Best Songwriter Exhibit D & E. Live From Cleveland Municipal Stadium

As a special treat for you Pencilstorm diehards on this January Sunday, here are TWO classic Kinks songs from the Rock Hall Of Fame Benefit Concert at the old Cleveland Municipal Stadium in 1995. This was the last American Kinks performance to date. And they CRUSHED. Let's hope they can get something together for the 50th Anniversary in 2014.  To read Ray Davies is the Best Songwriter Exhibit C click here    

Below, lyrics and video.

Exhibit C: All Day and All of the Night.  (punk rock begins)

Exhibit D: Lola  (a hit about a Transvestite)

I met her in a club down in old Soho
Where you drink champagne and it tastes just like cherry-cola [LP version: Coca-Cola]
See-oh-el-aye cola
She walked up to me and she asked me to dance
I asked her her name and in a dark brown voice she said Lola
El-oh-el-aye Lola la-la-la-la Lola

Well I'm not the world's most physical guy
But when she squeezed me tight she nearly broke my spine
Oh my Lola la-la-la-la Lola
Well I'm not dumb but I can't understand
Why she walked like a woman and talked like a man
Oh my Lola la-la-la-la Lola la-la-la-la Lola

Well we drank champagne and danced all night
Under electric candlelight
She picked me up and sat me on her knee
And said dear boy won't you come home with me
Well I'm not the world's most passionate guy
But when I looked in her eyes well I almost fell for my Lola
La-la-la-la Lola la-la-la-la Lola
Lola la-la-la-la Lola la-la-la-la Lola
I pushed her away
I walked to the door
I fell to the floor
I got down on my knees
Then I looked at her and she at me

Well that's the way that I want it to stay
And I always want it to be that way for my Lola
La-la-la-la Lola
Girls will be boys and boys will be girls
It's a mixed up muddled up shook up world except for Lola
La-la-la-la Lola

Well I left home just a week before
And I'd never ever kissed a woman before
But Lola smiled and took me by the hand
And said dear boy I'm gonna make you a man

Well I'm not the world's most masculine man
But I know what I am and I'm glad I'm a man
And so is Lola
La-la-la-la Lola la-la-la-la Lola
Lola la-la-la-la Lola la-la-la-la Lola

 

All the staff become part of my private collection. In any moment I don't want to use ilegally reserved rights. Opened channel without any lucrative purpose. The kinks performing All Day And All Of The Night and Lola at The Rock'n'Roll Hall Of Fame in Cleveland, Ohio, USA

The Perfect Age For Rock & Roll, part two by Ricki C.

Before I was old enough to have to sign up for a draft card (18 years old, for you young’uns out there) I had already seen The Jimi Hendrix Experience, The Doors, Bob Dylan’s first electric tour with The Band (when they were still called The Hawks or The Crackers), Cream, Janis Joplin & the Full Tilt Boogie Band, Sly & the Family Stone, The Dave Clark 5, The Animals, The Turtles, Paul Revere & the Raiders, The Standells, The Who (in 1969, which just happened to be THE BEST live show I have witnessed in my 61 years on the planet) and literally dozens of others, including little-remembered but great down-the-bill acts like Every Mother’s Son, The Left Banke and Cat Mother & the All Night Newsboys.

I saw all of those shows for free, courtesy of my sainted Italian father, whose nighttime job after days at the Columbia Gas of Ohio warehouse was with Central Ticket Office, an early forerunner of what Ticketmaster would become.    

My father died in April of 1970, two months short of my high school graduation and oddly, so did live rock & roll.

Oh, there was certainly the occasional great show: The Cincinnati Pop Festival June 13th, 1970 – one week after said graduation – where I saw Mott The Hoople for the first time, The Stooges for the second time, plus Alice Cooper (when they were still a rock band, before all the golf-pro showbiz bullshit), Mountain and Traffic; Brownsville Station whenever they played Valley Dale Ballroom or the old Columbus Agora; Aerosmith (bottom-billed BENEATH Robin Trower!) reintroducing sex into rock & roll whilst opening for Mott The Hoople in ’73 at Mershon Auditorium.  But as the months and then years went on I increasingly saw boring, pallid, xerox-of-xerox copies of the greatness I’d witnessed in the 1960’s: your Edgar Winter Groups, your Leon Russells, your Styxes, your Montroses, your Kansai.  Let’s face facts: I had seen Bob Dylan in his 1966 prime.  I had watched Jim Morrison declaim immaculate rock poetry and witnessed Jimi Hendrix reinvent the electric guitar right in front of my astonished teenage eyes, and now I was supposed to take fucking REO Speedwagon seriously?  Please.  I was supposed to tolerate Yes?  No.

In 1976 I was 24 years old, the Perfect Age For Being Burnt-Out On Rock & Roll.  And then I saw Bruce Springsteen live.

April 5th, 1976 I saw Bruce Springsteen & the E Street band live for the first time at the Ohio Theater here in Columbus, Ohio.  I was already a fan of Springsteen.  I’d bought Greetings from Asbury Park, N.J. and The Wild, Innocent & the E Street Shuffle when they were released back in 1973 and – in one of the excesses of my youth – borrowed a buddy’s car in 1974 (I didn’t have a driver’s license or a car of my own until 1979, but that’s a whole other blog for a whole ‘nother time) and drove to the outskirts of Cleveland, Ohio, to tape “Born To Run” off of a WMMS radio broadcast.  (‘MMS deejay Kid Leo had an advance tape of “Born To Run” MONTHS before the single was officially released by Columbia and would play it to open the weekend every Friday afternoon at either 4:55 or 5:05 pm.  I drove to Cleveland, waited until I was within range of WMMS, then sat in the car with my newly-acquired Panasonic portable cassette recorder in my lap until “Born To Run” played, taped the song, and drove home.  It never even occurred to me to check if anybody I wanted to see was playing in Cleveland that night, or to stay overnight.  I drove there, taped the song, and came home.  I had a mission.)  (Note to all you Arcade Fire kids from your Drunk Uncle Ricki: There was no internet, Spotify, Rhapsody, Dropbox or YouTube in 1976.  If I wanted to hear “Born To Run” I HAD TO TAPE IT OFF THE RADIO WITH A PORTABLE CASSETTE RECORDER IN MY LAP.)
 
Like I said, I liked Springsteen, but truthfully I was probably a bigger fan of a singer/songwriter named Elliott Murphy, who I also discovered in 1973.  (Both Springsteen & Murphy were part of the “New Dylan” cult/hype/club of the early 1970’s.  I was a pretty big fan of “New Dylans” back in the day – John Prine, Loudon Wainwright III and David Blue among them, plus Steve Forbert and Willie Nile later on in the 70’s.)  Truth be told, I was probably a bigger fan of New Dylans than of Bob Dylan himself, who I still think has made far more bad records than good records in his career, and maybe only 5 GREAT records.)  (Again, that’s a whole other blog for a whole ‘nother time.)

(Ricki, get to the fuckin’ point.)  (Alright, alright, alright!)    

By that April evening in 1976 I had already been reading about how great a live performer Bruce Springsteen was for more than two years.  Crawdaddy, Rolling Stone, Creem, Phonograph Record Magazine, the New Musical Express, etc. had all extolled the virtues & raptures of The Live Springsteen Experience.  I admit, I was pretty jaded by that point.  I had been seeing live rock shows for 10 or 11 years by then, had witnessed the above-mentioned Dylan, Morrison, Hendrix, Joplin, Clapton in their 1960’s primes.  In early 1976, however, Mott The Hoople and the New York Dolls had both broken up, Elliott Murphy had already recorded for (and been dropped by) TWO major labels, punk was a distant fuzzy rumor in the rock press and I was running perilously short of Rock & Roll Heroes.  I couldn’t, for the life of me, figure out what Bruce Springsteen was going to do at that point to show me something I hadn’t already seen.  

Springsteen opened the show alone at center stage, belting out a slowed-down, ballad version of “Thunder Road” under a single blue spotlight with only Roy Bittan playing piano behind him.  People, rock & roll performers did not open their shows with ballads under blue spotlights in 1976.  Kiss had already been invented.  Pyrotechnic flashpots, excruciatingly long guitar showcases & drum soloes were the order of the day.  I loved Aerosmith at that point, but holy shit, this one skinny guy with a blue denim cabbie cap and a scraggly beard was holding that entire theater transfixed with just his voice, his lyrics and one piano.  And then, just as Springsteen wailed a harmonica solo to close the song, the rest of the E Street Band walked onstage in near-total darkness and Max Weinberg SLAMMED into the opening drum riff to “Tenth Avenue Freeze Out” as Springsteen went into this wild, totally weird all-arms-and-legs dervish dance at center stage.  The band dropped into the song one by one: Gary Tallent on bass, Miami Steve Van Zandt on guitar, Bittan and Danny Federici on keyboards, Clarence Clemons on sax, building the tension unmercifully until Bruce grabbed the mic to sing “Tear drops on the city, Bad Scooter searchin’ for his groove” and we were off and running.  

As the E Streeters tore through the song, it was like a three-ring circus onstage, you didn’t know WHERE to look, WHO to watch.  Springsteen was dressed-down in jeans, t-shirt, some beat-to-shit hooded sweatshirt & high-top Converse sneakers, flanked by Van Zandt and Clemons in three-piece suits and fedoras.  People, rock & roll bands did not play shows in three-piece suits and fedoras in 1976.  And not just ANY three-piece suits: these were iridescent, colors-not-naturally-appearing-in-nature three-piece suits.  I swear Clemons’ was bright orange and Van Zandt sported a powder-blue number not ordinarily glimpsed outside of a New Jersey high-school senior prom.  Bittan and Federici were in some combination of dark jackets & ties and even Weinberg was wearing a long-sleeved shirt with a collar in the days when Joey Kramer of Aerosmith routinely took the stage in leather shorts, a tank-top and not much else.  Beards and bell-bottoms abounded.  It WAS 1976, after all.

Bruce and the boys simmered through a superlative rendition of “Spirit In The Night” and I started to realize: all the live hype I’d been reading about Springsteen & the E Street Band wasn’t so much about what they DID, it was about what they WERE.  I’d heard those first three songs literally hundreds of times since I bought Springsteen’s first three records (Born To Run had been released in August of 1975) and the live versions of the tunes were SO MUCH BETTER than their album counterparts I started to wonder why recording studios had ever been invented.

By the time that thought had fully formulated in my mind, Max Weinberg had kicked into the Bo Diddley Beat that opens “She’s The One.”  Only somehow he had minimized the already tribally-rudimentary Diddley beat from a primal seven notes down into FIVE notes.  I don’t know how long that intro went on (this was WAY before the band started using “Mona,” “Not Fade Away,” or “Gloria” as preludes), but I do know it had beaten its way into my heart like a fever and the entire audience had been mesmerized/brainwashed/brutalized into clapping those five notes over & over & over.  There was a moment after Bruce had started intoning, “With her killer graces and her secret places that no boy can fill,” but well before the chorus explosion that I glanced over at Clarence Clemons at his stage left position in almost total darkness.

Clemons was shaking six or eight maracas in front of his saxophone mic AS IF HIS FUCKING LIFE DEPENDED ON IT!  Clemons and the maracas were totally inaudible, there was no way you could hear them over the drums, keyboards & guitar, but he was playing his heart out on those shakers as if the song could not continue for one second without his contribution.  And that was when it hit me: very simply, very clearly, very jarringly – The E Street Band CARED about what they did.  They cared about playing rock & roll music to the exclusion of every other single thing on the planet.  All of the jag-off bands I had been watching since 1970 or so had become silly little play-acting children in my eyes, charlatans out to make a quick buck from the rubes in the cheap seats. 

By verse two when Springsteen & Van Zandt were singing, “But there’s this angel in her eyes that tells such desperate lies and all you want to do is believe her” in an Everly Brothers-style close harmony, a further revelation struck me: this isn’t just rock & roll music, this is soul music, this is blues, this is country, this is every American music I had ever heard.  This was the swagger of Elvis Presley and the wild-man mania of Little Richard & Jerry Lee Lewis crossed with the intellect of Bob Dylan paired with the arms-across-shoulders camaraderie of The Beatles & all the rest of The British Invasion, all of it shot through with the operatic swoon of Roy Orbison, the knee-drop brilliance of a James Brown live show and the grandeur of Phil Spector’s Wall Of Sound Ronettes and Righteous Brothers 7-inch 45 rpm singles.

But it was more than all that: it was the promise and the essence of every teenage garage band that never made it out of the garage or the teenage rec rooms or any further than the local Battle Of The Bands.  Right at that moment, all of a sudden, I was the Perfect Age For Rock & Roll again.

By time Clarence Clemons laid down the maracas and blew the entire song wide open and into the stratosphere with an absolutely breathtaking sax solo as Springsteen & Van Zandt yelled/sang, “WWWOOOOHHH, SHE’S THE ONE!” in tandem at the center mic, my brain – and the brains of every member of that audience – were exploding.  As the song smashed to a halt the crowd rose as one into a standing ovation, a standing ovation FIVE SONGS into the set.  Dear readers, in 1976 rock & roll audiences were still somewhat discerning, bands didn’t get a Standing O just for dragging their sequined, overpaid, hallowed asses onto a stage, the bands had to EARN that kudo.  

And then, before anybody could sit back down the E Street Band swooped into “Born To Run” and nailed the crowd to the back wall of the Ohio Theater with that future rock & roll anthem.  It really was quite brilliant.  And amazingly, the show just kept getting better & better.  There was a killer cover of Manfred Mann’s “Pretty Flamingo” (with an absolutely perfect shaggy dog Springsteen story that deserves and will someday probably get a blog all its own); there was “It’s Hard To Be A Saint In The City” and “The E Street Shuffle”; and at the close of the set “Backstreets,” “Jungleland,” and ”Rosalita” got played ALL IN A ROW.  And then there was an encore that brilliantly paired a heartbreaking “4th Of July, Asbury Park (Sandy)” with the all-out, take-no-prisoners rock & roll attack of the Mitch Ryder Detroit medley that remains a staple of E Street Band encores to this day. 

It was April 5th, 1976, when Bruce Springsteen & the E Street Band gave rock & roll back to me.  

And then the Darkness On The Edge Of Town tour in 1978 was even better.

I was The Perfect Age For Rock & Roll.  
    

(Obviously this segment of The Perfect Age of Rock & Roll got completely out of hand, 
we will conclude with Part Three - Punk-rock & Beyond - next time out.)


(This installment of The Perfect Age For Rock & Roll is dedicated to Chris Clinton,  my Irish brother in the rock & roll, whom I met when he wound up next to my friends & I in an all-night Bruce Springsteen tickets camp-out  line at Buzzard's Nest Records on Morse Road in 1984, and remains my friend to this day.  This is for you, Chris.    

It is further dedicated to my dear friend Jodie, who just DID NOT GET what I was on about with this Springsteen guy back in 1976, but who subsequently became a True Believer in The Church of The Holy E Street Band.) 

Why Wouldn't Bonds and Clemens Pay Sportswriters for Favorable Coverage? by Colin G.

Last week as the Baseball Hall of Fame ballots were being revealed I couldn't help noticing that some writers around the country and, most importantly, on ESPN were taking a decidedly softer stance on allowing PED (Performance Enhancing Drugs, for the non-juiced layman) users into the Hall of Fame than in past years. When referring to known abusers like Bonds and Clemens they would say things like "players who have been linked to steroid use.." and then just lump those two in with players like Jeff Bagwell and Mike Piazza who have never been found in a growth-hormone clinic ledger by the FBI or had a tainted syringe with their DNA on it associated with them. For anybody who has done even remedial research, Clemens and Bonds are guilty of systematic steroid abuse over a long period of time. Period. Case closed. Bagwell and Piazza are guilty of nothing but Popeye forearms and some back acne. Big difference.

What really jumped out at me is when one reporter on ESPN said, "Lots of people have been calling for reforming the process for how people vote for the Baseball Hall of Fame" Really? I'm a big baseball fan and I don't recall "lots" of  people calling for reforming the voting process for the HOF. Certainly not enough to warrant a lead story on Sportscenter with the NFL playoffs in full swing.

Then it hit me: what do powerful people and corporations do when they are found guilty of breaking the rules and therefore have trouble getting what they want? They hire lobbyists to alter the public dialogue and then simply CHANGE THE RULES to their advantage. Powerful people changing the rules is as American as apple pie and a shoddy heath care system. It is the way of the world. Why would the Baseball Hall of Fame be any different than Wall Street or Washington, DC? Or rock n roll for that matter. Remember when Rolling Stone magazine gave Mick Jagger's totally unlistenable solo record "Goddess in the Doorway", FIVE STARS?!? Yeah, nothing fishy there.......

Certainly Roger Clemens and Barry Bonds would have the motivation, the ego and the means to get a couple of known sportswriters in their back pocket to lobby on their behalf.  Successful athletes are made of money and not used to taking "No" for an answer. (See: every successful athlete.) $50,000 would go a long way for a sportswriter and, let's be frank, many people who cover sports are jock sniffers of the highest order in the first place. They would be honored to come on board and help out. I mean, congressmen were asking Clemens for his autograph before his ill-fated testimony on Capitol Hill. (Which dumb jock Roger Dodger requested and got as a favor.)

Unlike greasing a politician's palm, I'm pretty sure this would all be legal, if not exactly ethical. Who cares if  Barry wires some cash to a sportswriter in Miami, chalks it up to a consulting fee, and said writer then makes a big stink about the injustice of it all: "Oh the humanity, this is a joke. Bonds and Clemons and all the PED guys are getting a raw deal. I'll just give my vote away." Sounds like a well thought-out public relations strategy to me.

I guess we could just let everybody in, steroids be damned, but I just can't see assholes like Bonds and Clemens standing at Cooperstown making an acceptance speech still claiming they never used performance enhancing drugs, thus treating all us fans, fellow players and legit Hall of Famers such as Maddox, Glavine and Thomas like a bunch of f-ing jerks (as they say in "Goodfellas").  

And while I'm at it, Buster Olmey complaining that TEN votes aren't enough for him on his ballot is beyond absurd. Prioritize, MOFO. Didn't this nerd ever have to make a mix tape or a playlist? There just isn't room for everybody.  If Buster had it his way, seventeen players would all go into the Baseball Hall of Fame this August because that is how many he wanted to vote for on his ballot. Reminds me of the scene in Princess Bride were Prince Humperdink doubles the guards outside the castle.  Just silly. The induction ceremonies might look something like this..  

OK, Buster, if we are going to change the voting process for the Baseball Hall of Fame I have one minor request: please give Pencilstorm a vote. Here is my ballot, and I don't need ten......

Greg Maddux, Craig Biggo, Frank Thomas, Tom Glavine, Jeff Bagwell, Tim Raines.

Everybody else waits another year, particularly those lying dicks Bonds and Clemens. Though I suppose I could be persuaded to change positions in time for 2015, wink wink, nudge nudge. (This space available…..for a price.)

 

Colin Gawel owns Colin's Coffee,  writes for Pencilstorm, plays in the band Watershed (which you can read all about in the best selling and acclaimed memoir "Hitless Wonder") and is a life long Reds fan. He steals most of his writing style from Bill James but nobody seems to notice. 

 

* In fairness to Mick, while "Goodess in the Doorway" is truly "Dogshit in the Doorway" as fellow Stone Keith Richards once famously quipped, Jagger's previous solo effort "Wandering Spirit" - produced by Rick Rubin - is really possibly the best Stones album since "Some Girls." A clip from each record below.....you be the judge.

 Five Star Dogshit..

Mick Jagger feat. Lenny Kravitz - God Gave Me Everything [HQ] "God Gave Me Everything" is a song from Mick Jagger album Goddess in the Doorway. It was released on 19 November 2001 as the first single from the album.

 

"Don't Tear Me Up" from the excellent Wandering Spirit.

Uploaded by Andreihappyday on 2010-10-17.


The Browns Would Be Crazy Not to Hire Jim Tressel. by Colin G.

Jim Tressel should be the next head football coach of the Cleveland Browns. I know that at first blush it sounds crazy, but after a week of talking about it at the coffee shop, it occurred to me that hiring any of the other candidates is way crazier.

The Browns choices for head coach are:

A) A marginally successful assistant coach from an another NFL team or a former head coach who has already failed. The Browns are currently the laughingstock of the NFL and by firing their latest coach after just one year, have made themselves the least desirable job for any top-flight candidate looking for a new job.  Basically the Browns have their pick of scrubs, has been's and never will be's. 

or

B) A living legend with close ties to Northeast Ohio who bleeds for Cleveland. A man who won titles at Ohio State, Youngstown State and is currently a successful A.D. at Akron, not to mention his old man is also a legendary coaching figure from Baldwin Wallace. 

The Browns are a franchise in need of a face lift in the worst possible way and the hiring of Jim Tressel would make them instantly relevant again.  Maybe not nationally, but certainly where they need it most: with the Browns long-suffering fan base. Can you imagine the excitement when Coach Tressel would show up to accept the job in an orange sweater vest and proceed to give a tear-jerking speech about his respect for the tradition of Browns Football and his love for Northeast Ohio? I swear a riot might break out right then and there on the streets of Cleveland.

Can he do the job? For starters, being head football coach at Ohio State is way harder than coaching the Browns, so he should be prepared on that front. Ohio State has higher expectations, a bigger budget, more players, boosters, alumni, and an unhinged fan base. And, as we are well-aware, that pesky NCAA has a nasty habit of sniffing around asking about the starting QB's latest tattoo. You just don't get that kind of action/scrutiny in the National Football League. (see: Josh Gordon / Greg Little ) As an administrator I would say Jim Tressel is over-qualified to take on the Browns head coaching job. 

He would also bring some kind of football philosophy to the organization for the first time since Marty Schottenheimer was the coach. Whether you are a fan of "Tresselball" or not, he knows EXACTLY what he is trying to do and how he wants to win football games. Stout defense, good special teams and taking care of the football. Sounds like a pretty good fit for this particular Browns roster. 

Or, to put it another another way: If you were looking to hire somebody to run your company, which of the following names and resumes is the strongest? Chris Palmer, Butch Davis, Terry Robiskie, Romeo Crennel, Eric Mangini, Pat Shurmur, Rob Chudzinski, or.......

Jim Tressel.

Seriously folks, it's a no brainer. Expectations on the North Coast have never been lower and there isn't a person on Earth who can convince me that Jim Tressel couldn't do at least as good of a job as the list of previous Browns coaches. It is a golden opportunity to inject some instant excitement into the fan base, with tons of upside and very little downside.

What's the worst that can happen, the Browns keep losing? 

I can live with that. I plead with the Browns front office to give Jim Tressel a shot. 

 

Colin Gawel wrote this at Colin's Coffee on a busy Saturday morning so if it isn't exactly perfect what of it?

 

The Perfect Age For Rock & Roll, part one by Ricki C.

Everybody probably thinks they’re the perfect age for rock & roll, because about the time all of us hit 12 or 13 years old we get imprinted with the music, movies, books, (grandpa Ricki, what were books?) etc. that we will love throughout our lifetimes, and naturally think our choices are the best.  As I type this sentence, I am 61 years old and would like to present my case for why I am the perfect age for rock & roll.

I was born in 1952, meaning, first off, I am actually OLDER than rock & roll is. (Rock historians quibble endlessly about what the first “rock & roll” record was – from Ike Turner’s “Rocket 88” in 1951, or Ray Brown’s “Good Rockin’ Tonight” from 1947, but let’s face facts, Bill Haley’s “Rock Around The Clock” from 1954 was where things really got started as far as lily-white teenagers were concerned, and then came The Elvis.)

One big rock & roll advantage I had over my peers was that I was the baby of my family: my sister and brother are 7 and 10 years older than me, which means that when I was five years old in 1957 I was already being blasted by “All Shook Up” by Elvis Presley, “Jenny, Jenny” by Little Richard, “Rock & Roll Music” by Chuck Berry and “Great Balls Of Fire” by Jerry Lee Lewis in my dad’s Oldsmobile with my 12-year old sister Dianne controlling the radio dial.

Most crucially, in 1957 there was Buddy Holly’s “Peggy Sue,” the first song I remember hearing where my brain literally exploded.  I can remember like it was yesterday the first time that song detonated out of the tinny car radio speakers and I realized, “This is a song about a girl this guy knows whose name is Peggy Sue and he likes her, so he wrote a song about her.”  I was FIVE, people.  It was a lesson I never forgot.  If you like a girl, write a song about her.  For better or worse, it’s a precept I have lived with all of my life, to this day, 56 years later.

By 1959, of course, it was all over.  Elvis was drafted into the Army, Buddy Holly was dead from a plane crash, Chuck Berry was in prison on trumped-up sex charges, Little Richard had “gotten religion” and left rock & roll behind (for the first of many times), and Jerry Lee Lewis had been hounded out of the Big Time for marrying his 13-year old cousin.  (It was The South in the 1950’s, for Chrissakes, marrying his 13-year old cousin was probably the NICEST thing Jerry Lee could have done in those days.)  (By the way, I can’t help noticing that crazy, racist, homophobic Duck Dynasty guy is now advocating people marrying young teenage girls, and he’s a major Free Speech Culture Star to the Fox News, Reality TV and People Magazine set.  My, how times have changed.)

But I digress………

By time I was 10 years old in 1962, I had largely lost interest in music.  My sister listened to and loved all those white-bread pretty-boys whom Dick Clark invented to replace Elvis, Little Richard and Jerry Lee: your Fabians, your Paul Ankas, your Bobby Vees.  (Those guys were later supplanted by Bobby Sherman, Donny Osmond & Michael Jackson, later updated to Journey, Foreigner & Styx, later still to The Backstreet Boys and N’Sync, today to Bruno Mars, Justin Timberlake and Mumford & Sons).  All I cared about at that point was comic books and World War II.

And then in February, 1964, The Beatles appeared on the Ed Sullivan Show.  (I remember my big brother Al saying to me sometime earlier in January, while he was watching some news program, “This is that new band from England that everybody’s talking about.”  I looked up from my X-Men comic book to a scene of screaming girls and mop-haired boys, thought nothing much of it and returned to poring over the adventures of Cyclops, The Angel & Marvel Girl.)

I was 12 when The Beatles Hit America in 1964.  This is the only place I might question that I am The Perfect Age For Rock & Roll.  Kids three years my senior, who were born in 1949 – Bruce Springsteen and Elliott Murphy, among them – who were 15 in 1964 and had some grounding in folk guitar could (and did) almost immediately form rock & roll combos and start playing British Invasion hits in their garages and basement rec rooms.  On the other hand, when Punk hit in 1976, I was only 24 and still young enough to latch on, where the 27 & 28 year olds around me sneered down their prog-rock noses at The Ramones and The Clash.  (But I progress, more on that later………)

By the time The Beatles finished their three-Sundays-in-a-row stint on Ed Sullivan and I had fallen in love with the next Sullivan-approved British Invasion band – The Dave Clark 5 – every bit of my consciousness, allegiance & cash, every ounce of my being was allotted to rock & roll music.    

I would take the bus Downtown every Saturday morning and go to Marco Records and the Lazarus Department Store to look at and buy records.  I was a pretty typical rock & roll kid – buying singles by The Searchers, The Troggs and Freddie & the Dreamers, etc. – until sometime in 1966 when I saw The Who for the first time on Shindig.  (Shindig and Hullabaloo were the first rock & roll primetime TV shows.)  From the very first moment I saw Pete Townshend deploy a windmill strum on his Rickenbacker, followed by he and Keith Moon bashing their gear to smithereens, I knew I had found my New Favorite Band.

From The Who it was a short trip to The Kinks, The Yardbirds and The Rolling Stones (who I came to really late after my beloved Dave Clark 5, right around “Satisfaction”).  I left behind teenybopper magazines like “16” and “Tiger Beat” for the oh-so-astute Hit Parader magazine, which became my primer for folk-rock, The Lovin’ Spoonful, and The Blues Project.  Cream and Traffic followed in 1967.  1968 brought The Jimi Hendrix Experience and psychedelia to my solitary little world.  Then, fueled & bolstered by my sonic studies since age five in dad’s Olds, I joined my first rock & roll band.  The first song I ever sang onstage was “Magic Carpet Ride” by Steppenwolf.  I was 16.  I was the perfect age for rock & roll.  

In 1969 I simultaneously took in country-rock with The Flying Burritto Brothers and Poco side-by-side with High-Energy Detroit Rock from The MC5 and The Stooges.  I went through singer/songwriters with Crosby, Stills, Nash & Young, Joni Mitchell and James Taylor in 1970 and nascent laid-back hippie rock in ‘71 with Van Morrison (whom I had previously loved in the 60’s for “Gloria” and “Brown-Eyed Girl”).  I loved The Who right up through 1973 when they bored me to tears with Quadrophenia and it was time to move on to Bruce Springsteen, Mott The Hoople, The New York Dolls, Aerosmith and Elliott Murphy.  I thought that crew were gonna replace The Rolling Stones and Bob Dylan for a Whole New Age of 1970’s rock & roll.  I was 21 years old in 1973, The Perfect Age for that changeover in the Rock & Roll Zeitgeist.

Only that changeover, that Changing Of The Guard, that progression, that Out With The Old/In With The New that had sustained rock & roll at the dawn of every decade since the 1950’s never happened.  Radio tightened up.  New acts got stiffed.  The likes of Jefferson Airplane/Starship, The Grateful Dead, Elton John, Pink Floyd and The Allman Brothers got extended well past their sell-by dates.  The Rolling Stones and Dylan grew ever more boring by the year.  Anybody who had played at Woodstock was regarded as the Godhead.  Hippies ruled.  1974 & 1975 took forever to pass.

In 1976 I saw Bruce Springsteen & The E Street Band live for the first time, and the Patti Smith Group, The Ramones, The Clash and Tom Petty & the Heartbreakers beckoned.  I was 24 years old, the Perfect Age For Rock & Roll.  And that’s where we’re gonna pick up in part two………

 

(If you think Ricki C. is long-winded here, you should see the blog he maintained until 
December 31st, 2013,
Growing Old With Rock & Roll.  Yeesh, did he go on some tangents.)