Pencilstorm contributor Rob Braithwaite is watching 366 movies this year, so you don't have to, here is part ten of his continuing 2016 rundown......
Q&A Intro, 1-17, 18-36, 37-51, 52-66, 67-74, 75-87, 88-103, 104-120, 121-131, 132-152, 153-173, 174-187, 188-221, 222-255, 256-287, 288-314, 315-341, 342-366, Index
Ratings key:
★ ★ ★ ★ ★ = I can’t see giving anything that I’ve seen once five stars
★ ★ ★ ★ = get to the theater / move it up in your queue
★ ★ ★ = “three stars is a recommendation” - The Empire [magazine] Podcast
★ ★ = if the remote is too far away, you could do worse
★ = if the remote is too far away, get someone to move it closer then throw it at the TV
132
Approaching the Unknown (2016) ★
stars: Mark Strong, Luke Wilson, Sanaa Lathan
writer/director: Mark Elijah Roseberg
Some genius learned how to make water from dirt, so he’s going to Mars!
[singing] Here are a few of the terrible things:
The dialogue is awful. At times the narration is from the astronaut’s memoir in-process, working lines over until he gets it right. “This is a one way trip to Mars. I’m not going there to die; I’m going there to live!” He nailed that on his first attempt.
The logic of the mission seems cost prohibitive. First, the genius goes up, by himself. Three weeks later another solo fight to Mars will take off. He will set up the water machine. The other pilot will arrive to establish the barracks or something. They couldn’t go together? Maybe with a few other personnel to help lift things?
The genius constructed his machine within the ship and is constantly tinkering with it. Of course he breaks it.
Video conferencing isn’t as delayed as we know it do be. Calls from Earth to outer space are a little glitchy but you can have a normal conversation. One time the genius wakes from a nightmare and called the other ship to talk. If there was a crew, he could have leaned over the side of the bunk, “Hey, Jones, you awake?” “Yes, genius. How could I sleep with all your thrashing about up there.” “Sorry. I’m a little panicked.” “I would be too. Just because you can remove hydrogen and oxygen from Earth dirt to make water doesn’t mean it will work with Mars dirt.” “Shit, hadn't thought of that.” “…I hate you.”
watch The Martian instead
133
Popstar: Never Stop Never Stopping (2016) ★ ★ ★ ★
writers/stars: Adam Samberg, Jorma Taccone, Akiva Schaffer
directors: Akiva Schaffer, Joma Taccone
Former boy band star and breakout solo phenom Conner is set to release his second album. It does not go well. Hilarity ensues, even if you don’t know anything about hippity-hop or what a Belieber is.
double feature pairing: This Is Spinal Tap
134
The Lobster (2015) ★ ★ ★ ★
stars: Colin Farrell, Rachel Weisz, Olivia Coleman
director: Yorgos Lanthimos
It is unlawful to be unmarried. If you are found to be single, you have 45 days to find a mate, otherwise you are turned into an animal of your choosing.
The trailer, presenting a quirky romantic comedy, hides the darkness of the movie’s true nature. The world building is amazing. No examples. You should experience it for yourself.
double feature pairing: The Beaver
135
All Things Must Pass: The Rise and Fall of Tower Records (2015) ★ ★ ★
stars: Russ Solomon
director: Colin Hanks
The title says it all. It’s a fascinating story.
double feature pairing: Empire Records
136
Burnt (2015) ★ ★ ★
stars: Bradley Cooper, Sienna Miller, Daniel Brühl
director: John Wells
Tell me if you’ve heard this before: A talented chef self-destructs with booze and drugs then sobers up for a comeback years later.
Yep, this movie is going to tell you again. Thankfully, there’s a turn or two that keeps it on a path that not completely trampled. The chef, for instance, has a large debt to some shady characters. We are spared the shakedown and beating scenes.
It’s a good cast. And it ain’t doin’ nuthin’ to nobody. It’s fine.
Oh, I just remembered how it almost had an interesting ending, but there was more run time so they pulled bullshit out of their ass and got back to the completely trampled path.
Still, it’s fine.
tv pairing: Kitchen Confidential
137
Lebanon (2009) ★ ★
stars: Yoav Donat, Itay Tiran, Oshri Cohen
writer/director: Samuel Maoz
The first day of the First Lebanon War is seen through the inside of a tank and through its scopes.
Trapping the audience in the tank an interesting way to tell the story, even though it’s a tough vantage point to keep it interesting. The second the gun scope zoomed in to catch the horrors of war, I pretty much checked out. The gunner had a great turning radius so he didn’t miss a thing.
watch Phone Booth instead
138
Zootopia (2016) ★ ★ ★ ★
stars: Ginnifer Goodwin, Jason Bateman, Idria Elba
directors: Bryon Howard, Rich Moore
A bunny wants to be a cop. She’s told that bunnies aren’t cops. She becomes a cop yet is not respected. She takes on a missing persons case with the help of a con-fox. Life lessons ensue.
Take that, racism! Genuinely funny. And, in cartoon fashion, ends with a rousing song and dance number that you don’t need to watch.
double feature pairing: Tucker and Dale vs. Evil
139
Lambert & Stamp (2014) ★ ★ ★.5
stars: Christopher Stamp, Pete Townshend, Roger Daltrey
director: James D. Cooper
If you are a fan of The Who, then you’ve got a couple guys to thank for sponsoring and nurturing the group’s early days. If you aren’t, well, it’s still a great story
double feature pairing: School of Rock
140
Knuckleball! (2012) ★ ★ ★
stars: Tim Wakefield, R.A. Dickey
directors: Ricki Stern, Anne Sundberg
There were only two knuckleball pitchers in major league baseball during the 2011 season. Tim Wakefield enjoyed the stability of being with Boston for 15 years. R.A. Dickey struggled to find a permanent home where his pitch was welcome.
There’s no showdown between them or a dramatic reveal. It’s simply a look at a pitch that isn’t respected and the guys trying to make a career with it.
double feature pairing: Bull Durham
141
I Ought to Be in Pictures (1982) ★ ★ ★
stars: Walter Matthau, Dinah Manoff, Ann-Margret
director: Herbert Ross
Clunky Exposition Alert! Libby explains to her grandmother’s grave that she will be traveling to Los Angeles. She wants to be an actress and thinks her screenwriting father, out of her life since she was three, can help. Turns out she wanted to get to know her dad more, and he’s better off that she did. duh.
Neil Simon, not unlike the Coen Brothers, has a pattern to his writing that is his alone. It has a shtick feel about it that doesn’t age too well. I’m still entertained and amused by it. But that music, oof. A piano and stringed instruments, tickling and plucking along. It’s like water torture.
