The Blue Jackets Are Back, Are You?

As the Blue Jackets took the ice for the final time last season, the atmosphere inside Nationwide was fully loaded and ready to fire, just like the cannon that sits perched above the lower bowl at Nationwide Arena. While the team put the finishing touches on a near-miraculous 19-5-5 run to a playoff spot, the fans aimed years of frustration and disappointment toward the rafters and fired away. Sadly, they just missed the target as the Jackets lost out on making the playoffs by virtue of a dreaded tie-breaker rule.

According to team President John Davidson, Jackets fans lifted the the team onto their collective shoulders and carried them to victory that night. The Blue Jackets would like you to remember that.

This video, chock full of footage from that epic final game against Nashville at Nationwide on April 27th, was played for the home crowd prior to preseason games over the past couple of weeks. And it works. If watching this video doesn't rekindle flames of passion deep inside your CBJ soul and make you yearn to hear the cannon go boom, check to make sure the volume is on and your speakers are turned up. 

The battle resumes tonight at Nationwide as the Blue Jackets embark on the 2013-14 campaign. For those about to rock .... !

The One-Game Wildcard is Plenty Fair And Some Other Random Sports Takes by Colin G.

A 162 Game Schedule Seems Plenty Fair

I love the new MLB post season format as it both rewards the team with the best overall record and scares the shit out of teams that are forced into a one and done situation. As for the occasional, "but having your whole season just come down to one game isn't fair" argument, please spare me. 

See, your whole season isn't coming down to just one game, It's coming down to game #163 which you must win to advance to the next round of playoffs. When ESPN talking heads suggest the new system isn't fair, are they implying that a schedule that has one hundred and sixty two freakin' games doesn't give every team more than a fair shot to prove their worth? I would argue 162 games is more than fair to all MLB teams. Want to avoid a do or die situation? Easy, win more games and your team can sit home and watch on TV like the rest of us.

However, it may be time to ditch the division format and get back to a straight NL/AL League with the top three teams on each side avoiding the one game playoff. This would allow a much more balanced schedule so no team gets to feast on a cellar dweller more than the next.  Oh how the Yankees or Orioles would have loved to play the Astros 19 times this season instead of the Blue Jays.

Speaking of fair, the Reds 90 wins seems just about right. They are a excellent defensive team with good pitching but the offense still lacks the consistency to hang with the big dogs. When Dice K can shut you out, it doesn't bode well for a playoffs loaded with Kershaw and Wainwright and the like. Dusty has these guys playing like professionals and I have no doubt they will give their best effort, but that probably won't be enough. Not in the stacked NL this year anyway. 

Vegas agrees. Odds to win NL pennant. Dodgers 11/10, Cards 2/1 , Braves 18/5 , Reds and Pirates both 9/1.  AL has BoSox 27/20, Tigers 2/1, Tribe checking in at 9-1.

Who is this year's King of the Nerds You Ask? That's right, it's me. (bitches)

Yup, I won my fantasy baseball league for the second time in three years. Not exactly a dynasty, but an accomplishment all the same. I have been playing fantasy baseball for so long that you used to get written updates mailed to you every week by the league commish. That's right kids, before the internet.  

And over those last 20 years, I have finished in the 2nd division more often than not so this winning thing is still a geeky thrill for me. It's not a big money league or anything, it's just for fun. Though I suppose it is debatable how much "fun" it is to be checking your cell phone every 60 seconds monitoring a start by the A's Sonny Gray on the final day of the season. Nothing like getting all worked up over something you have zero control of. Like I said, NERDS.

And in closing....

Good thing Monty Kiffin was a successful defensive co-ordinator instead of a politician or we might be suffering through a Lane Kiffin presidency instead of watching him mangle football programs. Nepotism thy name is Lane. I hear Texas might be looking for a new head coach?

Colin Gawel wrote this on an especially slow morning at his coffee shop, the aptly named, Colin's Coffee. you can learn more about him and our other Pencilstorm contributors by clicking here.

It's Last Ditch, But Maybe Congress Should Watch "School House Rock"

 We here at Pencilstorm, as a general rule, do not get political because we would much rather talk about important subjects like The Replacements or fantasy sports. But last we checked, the Affordable Care Act was approved by the House (!) and Senate and then signed into law by the President of the United States. This turns a "Bill" into a "Law". It was challenged to the Supreme Court (think of as instant replay) and they upheld the law. Oh, and the President who supported the law won re-election in a landslide.

It doesn't matter if you agree with the law or not. That's the way it goes. Congress passes all sorts of things I don't agree with. Democracy, ain't it a bitch. Or from a parenting point of view, when my son Owen loses a little league game, He doesn't have to like it, but he has to line up, shake hands and say "good game". So maybe think of Democracy as one big little league game played by old white guys in suits. You win some, you lose some but try to be humble in victory and magnanimous in defeat. Sure, it sucks to lose, but the good news is that another election is coming up around the corner. Put the loss out of your mind and focus on improving to win the next "game". That's what I tell Owen anyway.

But let's give our elected leaders the benefit of the doubt on this one. Truth is, many members of the House of Representatives come from areas where public education isn't exactly, ahem, a priority, so to speak. Perhaps there is just some confusion about the whole legislative process and how the constitution works.  We here at Pencilstorm hope this cartoon below can clear things up and break the stalemate.

Colin Gawel plays music, runs a small coffee shop and writes some stuff sometimes. Learn more about him and our other Pencilstorm contributors by clicking here.

The classic Schoolhouse Rock song "I'm Just a Bill." For more information, go to www.DisneyEducation.com.

I'm Watching a Rolling Stones Tribute Band at the Hollywood Casino at 7:30 pm on a Thursday Evening, How Much More West Side Can I Get? by Ricki C.

Growing up rock & roll on the West Side of Columbus, Ohio, in the 1960’s & 70’s carries with it certain responsibilities: I have to hate Mumford & Sons, The National and Atoms For Peace because they are pussies, and are therefore NOT rock & roll; I have to keep Q-FM 96 as one of the pre-sets on my car radio – even though I’m utterly appalled by the complete lack of imagination and sheer mindlessness of the stations’ playlist – because they might play “Never Been Any Reason” by Head East; and because I watch NFL football on Sundays I am required to bemoan the fact that Bruno Mars is the halftime entertainment at this season’s Super Bowl because, well, he’s fucking Bruno Mars, for Chrissakes.

But I digress………

Growing up rock & roll on the West Side of Columbus, Ohio, in the 1960’s & 70’s means that I’m not supposed to be smart enough or that I’m supposed to be too drugged-out to remember that The Hollywood Casino is built on the site of the old General Motors plant, once the largest employer of non-college-educated folks on the West Side.  The fact that Columbus city leaders have chosen that as the site of the our little gambling palace is genuinely ironic, given that the casino almost certainly sucks a certain percentage of the unemployment compensation and retirement funds of the workers whose jobs were shipped overseas back during the “Republican Revolution” of the Ronald Reagan administration, jobs never to be had again on the West Side of Columbus, Ohio.  Talk about adding insult to injury.

But I digress………

My friend Rob and I met up on the North Side for our little Rolling Stones casino jaunt.  Rob and I go way back.  We met in 1976 when Rob became my boss at the West Side Service Merchandise location where I worked.  We bonded over the fact that Rob knew who The MC5 were and liked them.  That carried weight on the West Side in 1976.  Rob and I saw a lot of great rock & roll together over the years – Bob Seger & the Silver Bullet Band, Blue Oyster Cult in their heyday, Bruce Springsteen & the E Street Band – and also a lot of truly questionable rock shows - Steppenwolf in 1978, at least eight years past their prime and the debacle that was Kiss in 1976.  More than that, though, we saw a lot of great local Columbus bands: The Godz, Black Leather Touch, The Muff Brothers (later The Muffs) in the brief period when they were truly great before they became Money, and most of all Romantic Noise, Willie Phoenix’s best band EVER.  Rob is one of the few people on the planet to whom I don’t have to explain to how great Willie once was.

But I digress………

Satisfaction – the Stones tribute band in question – I thought was actually pretty good.  The lead singer bore more than a passing resemblance to Mick Jagger, was rail-thin, stayed in character the entire time, doing all of the between-song patter in an English accent (that was certainly better than Dick Van Dyke’s in Mary Poppins) and the Keith Richards character didn’t embarrass himself.  (He shoulda kept his mirrored shades on the whole show, though, the eyes always give away your age.)  I think the bass player was sporting a wig, but pulled off a credible Bill Wyman.  (I miss Bill Wyman, there are FIVE Rolling Stones.)  The drummer had Charlie Watts’ signature lick of pulling off the high-hat on the fourth beat of every measure down to a science, and the Ron Wood character was serviceable.

Unfortunately, I had just seen The Rolling Stones documentary Gimme Shelter on the big screen the week before at Colin and Brian Phillips’ Reelin’ & Rockin’ Movie series at the Gateway Film Center and the disparities in music and culture between 1969 and 2013 were glaringly, painfully obvious.  The audience (“crowd” might be too strong a word for the hundred or so souls gathered at the casino) was really the main problem.  The people who were once bright-eyed, stoned-fabulous fans of the Stones were now 60-year olds in embarrassing denim shorts and old, too-small Stones tour t-shirts, sporting either long, stringy grey hair under baseball caps, or no hair at all.  And there were definitely more walkers and canes in evidence than there were Harleys.

No naked fat chicks tried to clamber onstage like at Altamont but there was a requisite number of drunken, frowzy, bleached-blonde divorcees dancing down front in front of fake Mick.  But I am not making fun of my West Side sistren & brethren here, you must believe me.  To paraphrase: “What can a poor Stones fan do / ‘Cept to go to the casino on a Thursday night?”  Where else are 50 and 60 year olds supposed to go for a rock & roll good time, a twerking Miley Cyrus show?  Please.

So all in all it was a pretty depressing night.  Driving home I caught “Cecilia” by Simon & Garfunkel on the Newark oldies station, and was instantly transported back to January 1970, making out with Linda Finneran in her parents’ warm West Side living room, listening to her Bridge Over Troubled Waters  album.  Growing up in the 1960's & 70's, I don’t want rock & roll to be all about memories, but unfortunately right now it is. – Ricki C. / September 27th, 2013

Ricki C has forgotten more about Rock n Roll than you ever knew. Learn more about him and our other Pencilstorm contributors by clicking here. 

Why Wisconsin Football Hasn't Earned Respect, Stub Hub Update and Game Preview

The reason why Wisconsin football hasn't earned respect

The past two decades the Wisconsin Badgers have been routinely rolling up double digit win totals behind an imposing offensive line and a stable of talented running backs. Still, Bucky Badger fan will bemoan the lack of respect given to the program compared to other midwestern programs such as Ohio State, Michigan and Notre Dame. The problem is that despite the gawdy win totals, can anybody recall a signature Badger victory over an out of conference foe in the past decade?? Hmm........

Or more to the point, for allegedly being a football "powerhouse", can you even recall a single non conference game of note played by the Badgers in the past decade? I'm not talking bowl games, but teams the Badgers have actually scheduled? 

Of course you can't. Because Wisconsin hasn't played a SINGLE #20 ranked football team out side the Big Ten in the past decade. This isn't a one year schedule blip. This is TEN SEASONS of the Badgers actively avoiding any team that could be a threat to them entering the Big Ten with a loss. 

Who Have the Badgers played non conference in the past 10 years anyway? 

UNLV (4 times!) N illinois (4) UMASS, Tenn Tech, ASU, N. Ill, N Iowa, Utep, Oregon State, South Dakota, San Jose St, Austin Peay, Wofford, Fresno St, Akron, Marshall, Citadel,WSU, Hawaii (2), Cal Poly, .........

I'm not going to keep typing out this list of losers with customers breathing down my neck,  but you get the idea. 

By comparison, how many ranked teams has Ohio State played in the past decade? 

#17 Washington, #2 Texas, #2 Texas, #1 USC, #3 USC, #12 Miami, #24 NC State (w/ Phillips Rivers at QB. Bucks escape in OT. I was at that game)

So here is the deal Bucky Badger. If you want some respect on the national stage it's going to take more than an overtime win at Michigan State or being just another team stampeding over Nebraska to the tune of 8000 yards rushing and 70 points. It's time to suck it up and put a big boy on the pre conference schedule. No risk, no reward. (pussies)

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STUBHUB Update: 

 tickets for the OSU v Wisconsin Game are going for $140 or $20 over face value. To this point in the season if you just bought two tickets off Stubhub for every home game you would have paid a total of $590 vs $720 for comparable tickets. This doesn't include the "donation" to the university  for the privilege to purchase said tickets.

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Bucky Badger Looks to Bludgeon Bosa and Buckeyes. Game Preview.

The winner of this game is in the driver's seat to win the legendary leader division and possibly the opportunity to showcase their talents in the stale, corporate confines of the Hoosier Dome* come December. Nothing makes the Big Ten shine like playing in a domed stadium. That's what midwest football is all about. It's like the SEC title game with slower, fatter players and less crowd noise. 

Things to like about this game: 

Buckeyes have speed at multiply positions and should be able to expose the Badgers on the edge. 

If Devon Smith can beat the Wisconsin deep his freshman year, he can do early and often this season. 

Night game and perfect weather bode well for the home team. 

Things to like less: 

Never a good sign when the Buckeye's have a true freshman getting major minutes on the defensive line. Joey Bosa is just a babe even at 6' 6" and 275 pounds. Check back in three years and he will be a full grown man. In the meantime the Badgers have to licking their chops to test our young front. 

Other than Shazier who basically covers the entire field in front of Roby, no other linebacker has shown the ability to step up a plug a hole. If/when Shazier cramps up carrying the load, it will be the moment of truth for 5 star jumior Curtis Grant. Nothing tricky about the Badgers Curt, just tackle that huge guy running right at you. 

Explosive runs are what set Braxton Miller apart from the average player. Without question he is the best QB on the team. But if he starts slow, will dip shit Buckeye fan start clamoring for Kenny G and poison the Urban wishing well? 

Colin Gawel sits at his coffee shop and writes these things when he should be serving customers. 

* I just like using Hoosier Dome. 

Lydia Loveless @ Independents' Day Festival. Don't Miss This.

The last time I saw Lydia Loveless perform I turned to the stranger next to me and exclaimed,"Her voice is just as good as Lucinda Williams. It really is". Which is on par with saying, "that guy has as much charisma as Elvis", or "that bass player spits blood as well as Gene Simmons". Point being, she is great and you have the chance to see her for FREE at the always fabulous Independents' Day festival Saturday September 21st in Downtown Columbus.  

 Lydia will be heading back to tour Europe (again) this fall to get the planet pumped for her new release on Bloodshot Records set to drop in 2014.

To learn more about Lydia visit her website here or just pick up a copy of the latest Alive.  She is on the cover. Bam.

To learn more about Independents' Day and the complete line which features many great bands including: the New Bomb Turks, Nick Tolford, Karate Coyote, The Whiles, The Washington Beach Bums, The Girls and more click here.