Fantasy Baseball Update with Brian Phillips

Our editor sent me a Facebook message the other day with some fantasy baseball questions he was hoping I would answer. Ok, it was two weeks ago. Not much has changed in the interim except 67 more players have been severely injured. Elbows are exploding, hamstrings are shredding, discs are bulging. Hell, one player - Matt Cain - missed a start after trying to catch a knife he had dropped while making a sandwich. Cain makes several million dollars a year so it is charming that he's making his own sandwiches. This should end immediately. Not that it matters as Cain is now on the DL anyway (hamstring, not ham sandwich this time). I don't think it's a coincidence that most major league clubs are hovering one side or the other of .500. The DL is amplifying baseball's trend toward parity the past few seasons. As I write Oakland and Detroit hold the best records in baseball, and both clubs have stayed relatively healthy. 

Anyway I digress. Let's plow through em so I can get to another beer and the Mariners/Astros game at 10pm. (Oh yeah, I care.)

Q: How are your various fantasy teams doing?

A trap question, because if there's anything less interesting to everyone than your fantasy teams I have yet to find it. 

I'm in first in a league with our editor, 6th place in my long running keeper league (though I've been as high as third lately, it's pretty close), and 10th place in my 12-team no-trade league. I blame all of that on my pitching. Woeful. Homer Bailey needs to fall out of love with his shitty curve ball at some point. He'll be sitting on the bench for now. 

Q: What five players on your teams have been a pleasant surprise?

1. Nolan Arenado. I spent nine bucks at auction for the Rockies' third baseman. I liked his contact skills for such a young player and figured he'd play a ton owing to his nifty glove. After he reeled off a 28 game hitting streak with some pop here and there I've gotten way more than I thought. I think he'll be on my roster for a long time. Nice player.

2. Starlin Castro. I have the Cubs shortstop on two squads and have been very happy, especially with how late and cheap I obtained him. Sure he was crap last year, but always remember: Once a player displays skills he owns them. The kid needed to grow up a bit. The fact that he's put up solid numbers on a terrible Cubs team is all the more impressive. Pure profit so far.

3. Marlon Byrd. I know, I know. Hardly sexy. He had a nice year last year, but I was a skeptic. He was moving to a new club, he was a year older. That said he cost me almost nothing to keep, so I did. As I write he's around .300 with 6 bombs and 29 RBI. I run him out there every day without much thought and with all the injuries that's worth something.

4. Nelson Cruz. Like Byrd, Cruz is a former 'roid cheater. It's fantasy though and in this game I'm mercenary. He was a late pick and I was hoping maybe he'd give me some pop here and there. All he's done is put up a .282 14/41 slash line and he's a big reason why I'm sitting in first place. 

5. Scott Kazmir. I'll be honest, I was a bit baffled at the deal the always smart Oakland A's gave the resurrected Kazmir. Still, I threw down four bucks for him on a flier. Why? Always remember! The A's front office knows way more about pitching than you do. (See also Tampa Bay.) In 52 innings Kazmir has surrendered a scant 12 walks to go with a decent 43 strike outs. Guys aren't getting a ton of hits off him either. It's real and it's fantastic. 

Who have been your disappointments?

1. Homer Bailey. I know Bailey had a reputation for being a bit of a red ass, but with a great year in 2013 and a new contract I figured we were past all that. Boy, was I wrong. He's stunk up the joint. In the starts I've watched he's been throwing way too much breaking stuff and he's getting killed. 

2. Prince Fielder. I spent big bucks on Prince. He's never hurt and always puts up the numbers, until this year. At least we know why. Fielder will undergo season ending back surgery soon. 

3. Trevor Rosenthal. He was money in the closer role last year and I always assume the Cardinals know what they're doing. Sure he's logged 14 saves, but with an ERA pushing five he's on the verge of losing his gig. It's pretty simple, the kid isn't locating his fastball. He'd better get straight fast because ex-closer Jason Motte is back from Tommy John. 

Who should owners dump and have patience with?

Tough question. I've been doing this long enough to have grown a great deal of patience. I'll answer the question generally. You drafted guys for a reason. For example I don't own Carlos Santana, but if I did I would wait. This has happened before and he's too good a hitter to be this guy all season. Stick him on your bench and wait. That said Homer Bailey is on thin ice. 

Code Reds - Five Baseball Questions for Kevin J. Elliott and Ryan Haye

Johnny Cueto's stock has never been higher. Given his injury history would you consider trading him or any other Reds pitcher for an established bat to help this anemic offense? What position needs the upgrade most of all? Who would you target in a trade? 

Kevin - Never. Despite Cueto being injury prone, he actually appears to be getting stronger as the season progresses. What pitcher these days isn't injury prone? Just look at what we got with Ryan Madson. He never threw a pitch in a Reds uniform.  I don't even think Cueto's come close to reaching his peak as a pitcher. He's looking like Bob Gibson now on one of the league's best pitching staffs. We've got to keep our ace as I think we'll see multi seasons of his dominance down the road. 

Of course we need a bat. I'm the huge optimist in thinking that Votto and Bruce -- and perhaps Frazier -- will have above average seasons and Mez might hit 35 HRs, but certainly realize someone like Albert Pujols (yes, I said it, but we've become a home for former Cards) in this order would really shake things up. Or what about a young guy like the Rays' Will Myers?  I do think Skip Shumacker is a nice addition to the line-up, filling in where needed. Defensively we are golden -- so what do we need? Upgrades in the OF and a SS who could hit for average. 


Ryan - I have to agree with Kevin on this one. There is absolutely no scenario where trading Johnny Cueto is a good idea. He may be injury prone but he is also a known commodity and it’s just not worth getting rid of your ace for a “hot young prospect,” because “hot young prospects” never (statistically speaking)  pan out.  Cueto has turned into a real pitcher and with the adjustment to his windup - notice the decreased twist - and his decreased dependence on his fastball, I feel his injuries could be a thing of the past. Assuming he stays away from the buffet table. 

Thanks in part to Walt Jocketty’s off-season coma the Red’s are thin on the bench. Schumacker is nice but we have a very small sample size, Soto is lost, and nobody outside of Donegal, Ireland thinks Jack Hannahan is a viable backup to Frazier should he go down or when Hannahan returns from the DL. Sure, a bat is needed but with the injuries they’ve sustained this year I think it’s best to wait and see what happens when Bruce, and Votto get healthy. Hopefully, we get some hot bats and Mez can stay hot and healthy. 


2) Which contract you would most like to wave a magic wand and make disappear? Joey Votto 10 years/ $225 million/ expires 2023, Homer Bailey 6 years/ $105 million/ expires 2020, Brandon Phillips 6 years/ $72.5 million/ expires 2017/ Jay Bruce 6 years/ $51 million / expires 2017.

Kevin - Though I'm a homer for Homer, it's Homer. He's really grown in our organization but he'll never be more than a 3-4 guy in your rotation and always seems to be a risk on the mound -- I don't think two no-hitters should ever warrant that type of money. 

Ryan - This is obvious, it’s Homer (dammit Kevin, we agree again). He’s nice but his slow starts and his almost heroic ability to forget how to pitch one inning per game just doesn’t lend itself to the contract they gave him, especially when you’re a team that’s as deep as the Reds are on the mound. That being said, when he’s on he’s un-hittable. 


 3) Are you happy with the job Byran Price has done replacing Dusty Baker? What do you like and what has been disappointing? Are you surprised that the talk of moving Aroldis Chapman to the starting rotation completely disappeared this spring? Is this good or bad? 

Kevin - So far I'm on the fence with Price. I love his aggressiveness on the bases and his constant shifting of the line-up (though injuries have led to that). But I think his pitcher management has been atrocious. There is no reason guys like Ondrusek should be pitching in tight ballgames. As for Chap, when he's on there is no closer greater. I don't think that would ever translate well over 6-7 innings, though I'd love to one day see that proven wrong. 

Ryan - It kills me how much Price loves the bunt. I watched him use his last position player in a tied multi-inning marathon - his last position player! - only to send him to the plate to bunt. That is lunacy. Send a pitcher to the plate in that scenario, it’s not like your two best athletes left on the bench aren’t pitchers (Leake and Cingranni). Or DON’T BUNT. It has to be an organizational philosophy and Price is a company man. That being said, with what the Reds have had to face with injuries Price has done a fine job of managing the roster and the pitchers (mostly). Lastly, Ondrusek is the worst pitcher in the majors. I know it, and you know it.


4) Billy Hamilton is pretty damn exciting but can he become an everyday player? 

Kevin - With Choo gone, we have no choice. He should be playing his final year in AAA, but will have to buck-up and see what he can do in the big leagues. I've seen flashes that he can be a guy who gets on,   and when he gets on it's a thing to watch. But Marty was just discussing the legacy of Ricky Henderson the other night, who hit well and had an incredible OBP. Right now you just can't put Hamilton in any sort of sentence with Ricky Henderson. Fast? Yes. But boy, does he swing at some bad pitches. 

Ryan - He already is an everyday player and he seems to be getting better everyday. He’s young and he seems to be handling himself quite nicely thus far. Let’s just all calm down on the Ricky Henderson talk. Dude is a Hall of Famer and Hamilton is a kid. He’ll get there - which “there” may never be where Ricky got - but he’ll be a decent player as long as he stays healthy. 

5) The Reds are sitting at 20 -23 with one quarter of the MLB schedule complete, what is your best case win total and worst case at this point in the season. What scenerio leads to playoffs and what leads to disaster?

Kevin - Right now I think is rock bottom for this team. No Latos, no Votto, no Bruce - big holes.  If they could have scored an average of 3 runs a ballgame over that span, they'd be in first place. If the pitching holds up and we put a healthy team on the field, I don't see why we couldn't win 90 games. But, the Brewers and Cards look like superior teams, so things could get worse. 

Ryan - I’m fine with where the Reds are sitting right now. Like Kevin said they are hurt, not only hurt but they are missing three potential All-stars. They came out of one the most difficult April schedules essentially a .500 team, which considering the injuries is not too shabby. That being said, they need to be more consistent at the plate and they NEED their players to come off the DL ready to contribute. The margin of error is razor thin. I can’t see them north of the 90 win mark but that might be enough. I think the Brewers will come back to earth, the Cardinals -for perhaps the first time in years -have holes in their lineup and the Pirates just can’t seem to play consistent ball. It’s going to be a fun division to watch.

Ryan Haye and Kevin Elliott are both widely respected musicians and writers. More importantly, they know a shit ton about baseball and specifically, the Cincinnati Reds. 

Reelin' & Rockin' @ the Gateway: "The Kids Are Alright" by Ricki C.

The Reelin’ & Rockin’ selection for this month at the Gateway Film Center – The Who’s “The Kids Are Alright” – is, quite simply, in my humble opinion, the greatest rock & roll documentary ever made that doesn’t include any audience members being killed by Hell’s Angels.  (Obviously, that leaves “Gimme Shelter” as the single greatest rock doc ever.) * 

 “The Kids Are Alright” was directed by 22 year-old Who fanatic Jeff Stein, who sported no previous movie experience whatsoever, let alone qualifications that would allow him to direct a major motion picture.  But that was kinda the story of late 70’s movie-making: “Jaws” and “Star Wars” had come out of nowhere to become HUGELY POPULAR pictures and Hollywood studios realized there was a new youth demographic ripe for the picking.  Then the Ken Russell-directed debacle that was The Who’s “Tommy” scored big in 1975, hence talented rookie Jeff Stein was handed the keys to the car & the editing room and “The Kids Are Alright” is the result.  (By the way, I have never seen the movie “Tommy.”  I will never see the movie “Tommy.”  I wish the movie “Tommy” had never existed.  On my rock & roll planet the mega-success of that movie is what forever stalled/stunted/killed Pete Townshend’s creativity in the 1970’s and ever after.  But that’s a whole ‘nother blog for a whole ‘nother time.)

Okay, I’m gonna try to pitch this movie for every existing generation of rock & roll fan: 

1) If you came of age in the 1960’s or 70’s this movie is a glorification of the greatest live rock & roll band of all time.  And yeah, I’m very well-aware of the existence of The Rolling Stones and Led Zeppelin in those decades, and yeah I’m saying The Who were a better LIVE band than either one of them. 

2) If you came of age in the 1980’s or 1990’s this film is a glimpse into the time before MTV existed, when power & passion reigned, when you didn’t have to be pretty & you didn’t have to be polite and a guy with a nose like Pete Townshend’s could still reign as a major media figure.   

3) If you came of age in the 21st century this movie is a Masters Course on JUST HOW FAST rock & roll progressed in those long-lost hazy days between 1965 and 1969, when The Who moved from 2-minute songs like “I Can’t Explain” to the rock opera “Tommy” in just four short years.  Bands nowadays go four years between CD RELEASES, let alone leapfrogging genres, styles & movements the way Roger Daltrey, Pete Townshend, John Entwistle and Keith Moon did.

I’ve watched the DVD of “The Kids Are Alright” dozens, if not hundreds of times in the comfort & confines of my own home.  I haven’t seen it on the big screen at a movie theater since sometime in the 1980’s.  I can’t wait. – Ricki C. / May 15th, 2014

“THE KIDS ARE ALRIGHT” WILL PLAY AT THE GATEWAY FILM CENTER ON CAMPUS
THIS WEDNESDAY, MAY 21ST, AT 8 PM.  HAPPY HOUR BEGINS AT 7 PM.
COME TO HAPPY HOUR AND LET RICKI C. BORE YOU TO TEARS WITH LEGENDARY STORIES OF
HOW GREAT THE WHO WERE WHEN HE SAW THEM LIVE IN 1969 AND 1972, AND HOW MUCH
HE NOW WISHES PETE TOWNSHEND HAD DIED BEFORE HE GOT OLD.
A GOOD TIME WILL BE HAD BY ALL.

*For a rundown of a Ricki’s other Best Of lists, please see The Best Of Everything and The Best Of Everything, part two in his own blog Growing Old With Rock & Roll.)

Ricki C.'s Rock & Roll Videos You Oughta See, part the second: The Pop! / "Down On The Boulevard"

(Ricki C.'s Rock & Roll Videos You Oughta See will be a continuing feature in pencilstorm, at least until Ricki gets bored or the readership finds a way to make him stop.  Videos will be mainly little-seen or off-the-beaten-rock-&-roll-path. Click here for part one.

They're not exactly my answer/reply to Wal Ozello's Top Ten Rock Vocalists, but they all ARE rock & roll songs.  None of them are show tunes.

Ricki will provide an intro to the videos of not-more-than-500 words, because we all know it’s impossible for Ricki to try to tell a simple story without going off into 10 different tangents and then forgetting altogether what he’s talking about.)

The Pop! were a mid-to-late 1970’s L.A. band led by Roger Prescott & David Swanson.  “Down On The Boulevard” was featured on their self-released indie album released in 1977, and that record is as great a slab of 12-inch vinyl as you’re gonna find coming out of the punk & New Wave days of late 1970’s Los Angeles.  They later signed to Arista in the post “My Sharona” FIND-US-THE-NEXT-KNACK-NOW! signing frenzy in the great power-pop boomlet of 1979 & 1980.  Arista inexplicably tried to turn a fundamentally great power-pop band into Talking Heads or The Cars, and the resulting album – GO! – was cold, sterile & overproduced.  The Pop! were never the same again.  This song, however, is great.

Reasons They Never Made It In America – Too long-haired & pop for the punks (plus knew how to tune and actually play their guitars); too punk & not Kiss enough for the great unwashed rock & roll masses.     

Optional Extra-Credit Additional Viewing – Enter "The Pop!" plus “Shakeaway” on YouTube.

Ray Davies is the Best Songwriter Exhibit H

This is part H of of a semi regular segment systematically proving that Ray Davies is the greatest songwriter this planet has ever produced. Today's song, "Have A Cuppa Tea" is our first from The Kinks record Muswell Hillbillies but sure not to be the the last. Video and lyrics below. Click here to read previous Ray Davies exhibit.    Enjoy! - Colin G.

Have a Cuppa Tea  (Ray Davies)

The Kinks - Have a Cuppa Tea from Muswell Hillbillies album Formed in 1971. Ray Davies: Rhythm guitar and Vocals Dave Davies: Lead guitar and background vocals John Dalton: Bass Mick Avory: Drums John Gosling: Keyboards Lyrics: Granny's always ravin' and rantin' And she's always puffin' and pantin', And she's always screaming and shouting, And she's always brewing up tea.

Granny's always ravin' and rantin'
And she's always puffin' and pantin'
And she's always screamin' and shoutin'
And she's always brewin' up tea

Grandpappy's never late for his dinner
'Cos he loves his leg of beef
And he washes it down with a brandy
And a fresh made cup of tea

Have a cuppa tea, have a cuppa tea
Have a cuppa tea, have a cuppa tea
Hallelujah, Hallelujah, Hallelujah, Rosie Lea
Hallelujah, Hallelujah, Hallelujah, Rosie Lea

If you feel a bit under the weather
If you feel a little bit peeved
Take granny's stand by potion
For any old cough or wheeze
It's a cure for hepatitis, it's a cure for chronic insomnia
It's a cure for tonsillitis, and for water on the knee

Have a cuppa tea, have a cuppa tea
Hallelujah, Hallelujah, Hallelujah, Rosie Lea
Hallelujah, Hallelujah, Hallelujah, Rosie Lea

Tea in the morning, tea in the evening, tea at supper time
You get tea when it's rainin', tea when it's snowin'
Tea when the weather's fine
You get tea as a mid day stimulant
You get tea with your afternoon tea
For any old ailment or disease
For Christ sake have a cuppa tea

Hallelujah, Hallelujah, Hallelujah, Rosie Lea
Hallelujah, Hallelujah, Hallelujah, Rosie Lea

Whatever the situation, whatever the race or creed
Tea knows no segregation, no class nor pedigree
It knows no motivations, no sect or organization
It knows no one religion, nor political belief

Have a cuppa tea, have a cuppa tea
Have a cuppa tea, for Christ sake have a cuppa tea

Top Ten Vocalists: Part Three - Number One

You've been reading, watching, listening, and debating.

You've seen the first nine of my Top Ten list - agreed and fervently disagreed.

Now you want to know who my number one is.

Here's the crazy thing - it's a tie.

I can't decide. See... I was raised in the 80s during the days of power chords, big hair, and leather spandex. But my brothers were ten years older than me and they taught me rock 'n roll starting with the music they listed to in the 70s.

So I'm stuck living in both worlds - the 70s and the 80s, which is why it's a tie.

My first #1 is Freddie Mercury

If you've been following along this isn't going to be a surprise to you. I'm into the power vocalists from the 70s, the guys with range and talent.  I've been saying you have to have more than passion or attitude to be on my list. Here's the thing... Freddie's got the complete package: attitude, performance, presence, and a voice like no other. The guy has a massive range and total control of this voice. The way he used vibrato then add a little growl is his trademark. Listen to these isolated vocal tracks from the recording of Somebody To Love. Here's the truly miraculous thing: there wasn't autotune in those days.  It was all pitch perfect.

Only Freddie Mercury could write and sing a song that blends opera and rock n roll, and then have the masses fall in love with it. Think about this for a moment. Practically the same audience that would blast out any other rocking 70s tune would still turn this song up on the radio.

Finally, check out this song - "Who Wants To Live Forever?" On the record, Brian May the guitarist sings the first verse then you can instantly tell when Freddie takes over. Listen to the passion that he slowly builds throughout the song to an explosion at the end.

But here's the thing: Freddie's awesome but he's not perfect.  In fact, I was hard pressed to find any rock vocalist that fit my high standards to be number one. That's why I have a tie.

My other #1: Axl Rose

Yeah. You read that correctly. Axl f'n Rose. The guy has that distinctive angry rock voice but he's got talent, too. He's got this weird range that's both tenor and baritone at the same time. When I first listened to Appetite For Destruction I actually thought there was two lead singers. But why should that keep him off my list? If anything that's a plus in rock 'n roll.

A couple video tracks here. First is one of my favorites - Paradise City. Axl's sandpaper voice scrapes out the high notes on the chorus while his rythmic melodies rock out the verses. I swear that the Axl's on beat during the first verse and Adler's off rhythm. I'm also pretty sure that Axl's singing both leads and back-up vocals on the opening chorus.

Here's Axl's baritone voice at it's best. Again, the rhythmic melodies really kick ass here. This is live in '88 at the Ritz. Slash isn't at his best in the clip, nor is the rest of the band. My guess is they are all flying high on heroin.

Here's Axl's softer side that really lets his melodies shine. It sounds nothing like the guy who sings Paradise City and Welcome To The Jungle. This is Patience off of Lies, Lies, Lies.

So here's the problem with Axl and why he wasn't a clear #1 for me. Everything after Lies, Lies, Lies was an abomination. Use Your Illusion I & II was such an overproduced bag of shit it was pathetic. Way to ruin the rawness that made Guns N Roses what it was.

So that's my top ten.

Wal Ozello is the author of Assignment 1989: The Time Travel Wars and was the lead singer of the Columbus hairband Armada. He's a resident of Upper Arlington, Ohio and a frequent customer at Colin's Coffee.

Learn more about Wal Ozello and other Pencilstorm contributors by clicking here